Here are 5 things God will do in your life to let you know that your heart is ready to be in a godly Christian relationship.
1. If God Has Led You to Say “No” to a Relationship Even Though You Really Liked This Person, This Is a Good Sign That Your Heart Is Ready for a Christian Relationship
One of the best ways to trust God’s “Yes” to you is to know that you are truly willing to also obey him if he says “No” to you. Sometimes you may find yourself in a situation where you and someone else really connect socially and there is obvious chemistry between you both, but you also know that this person does not have the type of biblical qualities a Christian spouse should have. As Psalm 15:1-4 (NIV) states:
Lord, who may dwell in your sacred tent? Who may live on your holy mountain? The one whose walk is blameless, who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from their heart . . . who keeps an oath even when it hurts, and does not change their mind . . . .”
It’s been my experience that before God often brings “the one” he does want you to marry, he will often train you through a relationship with someone he does not want you to marry. So while it may be very hard to let this relationship go, when you do obey what God is saying and you don’t enter into a relationship with someone that you like because you know they are not obeying the word of God, then this is a very big sign of maturity on your end.
2. When Your Prayers Shift from “God, give me that one” to “God, please bring me the right one you want for me,” This Is a Sign Your Heart Is Ready for a Relationship
One indicator that we are on the path to maturity is the type of prayers that we pray. There’s certainly nothing wrong with asking God for the specific things you desire; however, the more you mature in the Lord the less you will focus on what you want and the more you will focus on what God wants for you.
Notice what Jesus said in Mark 14:36, “Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” I love this verse because Jesus points out two important facts. 1. God is truly able to do anything he wants. But 2. God desires that we submit to his will rather than demanding our own.
This is very important when it comes to praying about your relationship desires. Sometimes people get locked into praying for only one specific desire. Rather than praying for “that one” person you wish you could be with, eventually your heart must submit to God and begin to pray, “Lord, I’d like to be married to that person one day, but your will be done, not mine. I submit to you. Please bring me the one you want me to marry and make it clear to me.”
When you begin to pray like that, this is a sign your heart is ready to be in a godly relationship.
3. When You Know You Truly Want to Be Married to Glorify God, This Is a Sign God Is Telling You Your Heart Is Ready for a Relationship
This is actually one of the big topics I discuss in AGW University. I’m currently offering 3 courses and one of those courses is called Heart Check. In that course I unpack how to reject sinful motives for marriage and how to embrace God-honoring motives for marriage.
As I discuss in this course, there are many good motives to want to be married. If you want to be married to have a partner in ministry to serve with, that is a good motive. If you want a companion to enjoy life with, that is a good motive. If you want to be married to give your love to someone and to receive love as well, that is a good motive.
Ultimately, however, the Bible teaches us that the best motive for everything, including marriage, is to glorify God. For as 1 Corinthians 10:31 famously states, “So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” So if you have come to that place in your heart where you desire to be married not only for personal reasons but also because you feel led to bring glory to God through your future marriage, this is a strong sign that your heart is ready for a relationship.
If you want more info on how to sanctify the motives of your heart so you can desire marriage in the right way, I wanted to quickly let you know that I am accepting new students into AGW University until Tuesday, August 20th at 11:59pm (EST.). If you want more information about all the video courses, private Facebook group, the bonus access to 7 of my books, and the 3 months of email coaching with me, you can click here to learn more. This offer won’t be available next week so if you’re interested I would definitely encourage you to check it out.
4. When Your Heart Is Ready for a Christian Relationship, Your Heart Will Also Be Ready to Serve God in Singleness Even If You Never Do Get Married
Ironically, the more content you are to serve God even if you never do get married, the more your heart is actually getting prepared to serve God when you do finally get married one day.
Generally speaking, the more willing you are to let something go, the more ready you are to receive it from God. The reason this is often the case is because God will never bless you with an idol. When God knows something is being elevated to a place greater than himself in your heart, God will often lovingly withhold this blessing until you repent of this sin and put this desire back in its rightful place.
The desire for marriage is biblical and very pleasing to God. I’m certainly not saying you need let go of that desire and want to be single forever so God will bless you with a marriage. But we should seek to live like Jesus who wanted to avoid the cross but was also willing to endure it for the joy set before him (Hebrews 12:2). So we too must always place our desire to serve God over our desire for anything else.
5. When You Are Willing to Sacrifice Your Desires Out of Love for Another Person, This Is a Sign Your Heart Is Ready for a Christian Relationship
There are countless issues and conflicts that will always come up in any relationship. Because everyone is different, no matter how compatible two people are, there will still be some differences between them. While I am certainly not saying that you should be willing to sacrifice everything you want in life just to make it work with someone, I am saying that when you truly meet the person God desires you to marry, you will make compromises to be with this person out of joy and not out of resentment.
Perhaps you will need to make some career sacrifices, perhaps you will need to adjust your timeline for when you thought you would have children, or perhaps you will need to readjust your expectations for the type of personality your future spouse will actually have. The point is, true love is about sacrificing yourself for the benefit of the other person. Ideally you will be willing to sacrifice for them and they will also be willing to sacrifice for you. If things are one-sided then that is not healthy.
But when you are prepared to truly put someone else above yourself, this is a sign that your heart is ready for a Christian relationship.
For more information on AGW University, feel free to click here for more information. There’s only one more week to enroll if you want life-time access to all 3 relationship training courses, life-time access to 7 of my ebooks, life-time access to the private Facebook group for AGW students only, and the 3 months of email coaching. I’d love to get to know you personally and help out in any way I can.