4 Reasons God Is Not Removing Your Loneliness

If God is all powerful and all loving, why won’t he just take away your loneliness? Here are 4 possible reasons for why God is not removing your loneliness right now.

And if you haven’t heard, there’s only a few more days left to enroll in AGW University. These relationship training courses stem right from God’s word. I created these classes for Christians singles of any age who want to be in a healthy relationship.

For more information about these courses, the email coaching with me, and the current scholarship, click here before the November 25^th enrollment deadline.

1. God Is Not Removing Your Loneliness Because He Needs You to Feel This Way So You Know There’s Something Missing in Your Life

Pain is never pointless. God always has a purpose for it. He doesn’t enjoy allowing his children to suffer. But he never wastes the suffering either. His glorification through our good is always his aim. The benediction in Hebrews 13:21 asks God to “equip you with everything good that you may do his will, working in us that which is pleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.”

The pain you feel in your loneliness is pointing to something you need to be equipped with. Pain is often like the finger of God pointing out a problem he wants to fix. Loneliness is not a feeling we will have when we have all that we need. Thus, when you feel lonely, God is saying you don’t have something you need. Generally speaking, loneliness is due to a lack in one of these three areas:

• God: First and foremost, our hearts must be right with God if we hope to escape the pain of loneliness. You can have the best spouse, the most wholesome family, and a loving Christian community; but if you are not right with God through Jesus Christ, your heart will ache with loneliness (Psalm 16:11).
• A relationship: Before Adam fell to temptation, there was a need in him for a woman. This was not a mistake in God’s design. The Lord made some of us to actually need a spouse in order to not feel lonely. You can survive without a spouse if you have God. But it’s not wrong to feel this lack. Your loneliness is often a sign God made you to be married, just like he did for Adam and Eve (Genesis 2:18).
• Community: Many are called to singleness. If you have this calling, you will not ache for a spouse. However, even if someone has the gift of singleness like Paul did (1 Corinthians 7:7), God still made them with a need for a healthy community (Philippians 1:8). Whether you are married or single, we all need Christian fellowship (Hebrews 13:24-25).

2. God Is Not Removing Your Loneliness Because He’s Teaching You How to Find What You Need Rather than Keeping You Immature

So if you are lonely, that’s a sign you need something you don’t have. Therefore, the next logical question is, “Why won’t God give me what I need so I don’t feel lonely?”

There are times where God will just give you something you need without you doing anything to receive it. However, this is not the normal way God will bring blessings into your life because this would keep you immature and untrained. As the old saying goes: Give a man a fish, you’ll feed him for a day. Teach a man how to fish, you’ll feed him for a lifetime.

If God just magically took away your loneliness now without anything changing in your perspective or circumstances, you would never learn how to solve the future problems you will experience. For example, if you don’t know how to be fulfilled in singleness, you won’t know how to be fulfilled in marriage. If you don’t know how to connect with people, you will not know how to love people in greater and greater ways.

In short, God is not going to just remove all forms of loneliness in your life without first teaching you the relational lessons you need to know so you can get your needs met in biblical ways (Hebrews 12:11).

3. God Is Not Removing Your Loneliness Because He’s Taking It Away at the Root, Which Is a Longer Process

God is not a superficial healer. He’s the God who changes the heart (Ezekiel 36:26). Jesus said we are like a tree. If you want different fruit, you have to change the whole tree (Matthew 7:17-20). This requires a much deeper process of change and growth than merely changing the superficial variables in your life.

So God is not going to just remove every unpleasant emotion you have, like loneliness, while ignoring the deeper issues occurring. This type of healing and provision takes much more time to produce, but it actually solves the issue rather than placating you for a while until you start begging for another superficial blessing that isn’t really going to solve the real issue you are experiencing.

4. God Is Not Removing Your Loneliness Because He’s Giving the World Time to Repent

Ultimately, we are only going to be totally fulfilled with everything we ever wanted once we have resurrected bodies and we are living on the new earth. In Revelation 21:1-5, we are given a vision of the new heaven and the new earth, where God will wipe away every tear, and where he will make all things new.

There is immense fulfillment right now in the gospel, in our relationship with God, in our relationship with another person, and in our relationship with a healthy Christian community. But ultimately, there will always be a hunger for more during this season because God has not yet fully restored all things to the way they are meant to be (Romans 8:22-25).

So why doesn’t God just restore all things right now? He’s giving the world time to repent. 2 Peter 3:9 states, “The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.”

Therefore, hold onto the promises of God. You will experience much relief and satisfaction now if you fully follow Jesus in this life. But always remember that the full redemption is a future hope not yet fully given. God is with us in our loneliness. He will take some of it away now. And he will take it all away when he returns.

If you would like to continue to study these relationship topics from a biblical perspective, you may really enjoy AGW University. These courses are not for everyone. I designed them for people who have a specific desire to be married one day and who are in a season of life to study and work hard.

So if you are a Christian single person who wants to learn about the steps to take towards meeting, dating, and marrying the person God may have for you, I encourage you to click here to explore AGW University. 

The deadline to enroll is 11/25/24 by 11:59pm.