If you’re unmarried, this certainly doesn’t mean Satan is the cause. According to Scripture, singleness is just as much as gift from God as marriage is (1 Corinthians 7:7). Some people prefer to be single and are intentionally choosing not to get married.
However, for other Christian singles, they want to be married but are being prevented by Satan. Of course God is ultimately in control, but when we give into Satan’s temptations, there are negative consequences; and this is true in relationships as well.
When Satan wants to keep you single, one of his main temptations will be idolatry. Here are 4 signs this could be happening to you.
1. Satan Is Using Idolatry to Keep You Single If You Are Completely Avoiding the Opposite Sex Because You Care Too Much About What They Think of You
When we think of idolatry in regards to relationships, we usually think about idolizing a person and being obsessed with them. Certainly this is one expression of idolatry. But did you know that extreme avoidance, not just extreme pursuit, can also be a sign of idolatry?
Sometimes people avoid the opposite sex because they are idolizing the opposite sex. They care so much about what the opposite sex thinks of them that the pressure becomes too great and they just completely avoid relationships all together.
In other words, idolatry is often marked by being defined by someone. You are trying to find your identity in what you worship. Thus, in fear of being defined as a failure by the opposite sex, you may just avoid taking the test at all. You’ve given the opposite sex so much power over your identity, you completely avoid them because you are so afraid they might disapprove of you.
This will obviously keep you unmarried. You can’t meet the person God has for you if you run from every romantic relationship opportunity you have.
When your identify is firmly rooted in Christ, you will be able to risk rejection (Matthew 10:28). Yes, it will still hurt. But when you are not worshiping the opposite sex, you will be just fine if things don’t go well. When you are paralyzed in fear and completely avoid romance even though you want to be married, this is a sure sign Satan is tempting you with idolatry.
2. If You’ve Given Up on Ever Meeting Someone You Could Marry Because You Believe “The One Got Away,” That Is a Sign You Are Unmarried Because Satan Is Using Idolatry
Is there really such a thing as “the one that got away”? Perhaps. It really depends on how you look at it. In the macro, it’s impossible to never end up with the one because they are only actually the one if you do end up together. However, on the micro level, you can say that you will miss good relationship opportunities when you make bad choices in your life.
In the end, you have to repent of past sins, make the next right choice, and then leave the results to God, knowing that he will bring about his perfect will even though we do not live sinless lives.
But for our purposes here, the real danger is simply having the belief that “the one got away.” If you think you missed out on someone in your past who was the only chance you would ever have at marriage, then that belief will cause you to miss out on good relationship opportunities in the present.
Really, a belief like that is usually rooted in idolatry. You’ve built that person up too much and now you have come to believe they were the best person you could ever hope for. I’m not saying you need to demonize this person to get over them, but you do need to accept that they were not so unique that you are forever doomed to being unhappy with anyone else. That’s what Satan wants you to believe.
Without an openness to the biblical belief that God has a good plan for you (Matthew 7:7, Philippians 1:6, Jeremiah 29:11), you will often miss that good plan.
3. If You Put Too Much Pressure on People and Thus Push Them Away, This Could Mean Satan Is Tempting You with Idolatry to Keep You Unmarried
When you fall really hard for someone, oftentimes you will put too much pressure on this person to be someone they know they cannot be for you.
We all know ourselves. When someone thinks we are this perfect person who will never disappoint them, we feel this and it scares us. We know we aren’t this perfect person. We know we will disappoint them eventually. And so we usually get pushed away from this person in fear that they aren’t really seeing the true version of ourselves.
Thus, if you have a pattern of scaring people away because you put too much pressure on them to be your everything, this probably means you are idolizing them. When God is Lord of your heart, it frees you to enjoy other blessings for what they can be rather than ruining them because of what they can’t be (1 Timothy 6:17).
4. If You Believe Your Person Will Be Marked By a Stress Free Connection with Them, This Could Mean Satan Is Using Idolatry to Keep You Unmarried
Idolatry often causes us to live in a fantasy world that is always tranquil and dreamlike. However, when God is truly revealing your person, this does not mean you will have a stress-free relationship. In fact, God often uses stress to help you find the right person.
How does he do that? I unpack that topic more in this article right here, 5 Stressful Things God Will Use to Reveal Your Person
