Do You Want an Introverted Christian Man to Pursue You? Here Are 3 Things You Need to Know!

Do you like an introverted guy? Do you want him to pursue you? If so, here are 3 things you need to know!

And as a quick disclaimer, everyone is different. While I am a Christian introverted man, I know not all Christian introverted men are exactly the same. So rather than giving you absolutes here, my goal is to give you general principles that tend to be true with introverted guys. But I encourage you to really weigh through each point with the Lord to see if it actually applies to your situation or not.

1. If You Want an Introverted Christian Man to Pursue You, Create Opportunities to Be One-On-One Together

Hebrews 10:24 (NLT) says, “Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works.” Thus, it’s right for you, as a Christian woman, to consider how you can help this man love you and pursue you if that’s God’s will for you both. One way to best help him is to first understand him.

What does it really mean to be introverted? Many people think it means we are shy, aren’t good at public speaking, or like to sit alone at home and read books all day. While these things certainly can be true of some introverts, this is not what it means to be introverted.

Introvert and extrovert are psychological terms that help describe someone’s personality. These terms are not meant to describe how someone behaves, as behavior is a choice. As an introvert, I choose to be social, I’ve learned how to public speak, and I know how to hold a conversation with someone I’ve never met before. The real difference between introverts and extroverts is how we gain and lose energy.

An extrovert may like to be alone sometimes, to read books, and they may fear public speaking. However, they gain energy from being around more people and they tend to lose energy when they are alone for too long. The opposite is true of introverts. We can enjoy being around lots of people, but eventually this takes all our energy and we need to recharge in a quiet place away from the masses.

I say all of this because an introverted Christian man will really only open up away from the group. The more people present, the more his senses will be pulled in many directions, preventing him from feeling at ease. However, the smaller the group, the more likely his energy will be higher, thus he will have more ability to just be himself. This will allow you two to make a more natural connection and bond in the ways that are needed before he will pursue you.

2. If You Like an Introverted Christian Man, Think in Terms of Depth and Not Breadth

1 Peter 4:10 (NLT), “God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another.” I wouldn’t call introversion and extroversion a spiritual gift. However, we can see the principle here that God has gifted us all differently, but he wants us all to use our gifts to love others.

So how will an introverted man try to love a woman compared to an extroverted man? We introverts have a natural tendency to spend more time and energy on what we really enjoy rather than dabbling in lots of things we kind of enjoy. This is important for you to know if you like an introverted Christian man because it will affect the way in which he is trying to show his feelings for you. You may have to adapt your expectations. For example:

• Perhaps you are used to a man pursue you romantically as soon as there is chemistry. However, it’s unlikely that a Christian introverted man does this. He will typically linger longer in the friendship phase of the pursuit process because he will be enjoying getting to know you so much.
• Maybe you are used to a guy who starts verbally expressing his feelings right away with little phrases, texts, or gifts. However, an introverted man may be expressing his interest in you by asking you deep questions and investing in meaningful conversations about your dreams and desires.
• Perhaps every other guy wanted to show you off, go somewhere public, and get dressed up for a night on the town. However, an introverted Christian guy may want to go for a walk in the woods and show you is favorite secret spots, he may want to have a picnic date in the country, or he may want to have another quiet night at home where you two can watch a movie and then talk about it afterwards.

3. If You Want an Introverted Christian Man to Pursue You, Accept His Weaknesses So You Can Also Appreciate His Strengths

Psalm 139:13-14, “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.”

An introverted Christian guy is not better or worse than an extroverted Christian guy. Really, they’re just different.

So before you really start hoping to be with a certain introverted Christian man, just make sure you realize there will always be a tradeoff somewhere. If you want a man with all the good of both extroverts and introverts and none of the bad, you will never meet a guy like this. You will also push away the guys who do like you because they will know they can never live up to your unrealistic expectations.

Introverts will have certain desires and gifts that an extrovert doesn’t have, and the opposite will be true as well. Whenever you say yes to one option, you are always saying no to a different option.

Just as you want to be appreciated for who you are and not made to feel bad because of what you are not, so too will an introverted man like being around you more if you can accept his strengths and weaknesses.

Did you know that sometimes an introverted man will be pursuing a woman without her even realizing it? Is that happening to you? You can read this article to find out: 3 Signs God Is Preparing a Quiet Man to Pursue You.