Here are 3 things that God will not do when he is revealing the one to you.
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1. God Will Not Use Blind Faith to Reveal The One to You
God will require you to have faith in him as you follow his plan for your life, including when it comes to the path he will lead you down to reveal the one to you. However, God will never require you to have blind faith.
Biblical faith and blind faith are two very different things. Biblical faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen (Hebrews 11:1). Biblical faith is a gift from the Holy Spirit that opens our eyes to the evidence God is sending. Biblical faith is not about believing something that is unbelievable. It’s about believing something that is very believable even though you can’t fully see it right now.
For example, we did not see Jesus rise from the dead. But the fact that there were hundreds of eye witnesses to Jesus’ resurrected body, the fact that the prophecies made by Jesus have come true, and the fact that the power of the Holy Spirit changes our lives just as Jesus promised are all good pieces of evidence that Jesus really did rise from the dead even though we did not see it (1 Corinthians 15:3-5). So we have to have faith that the resurrection occurred because we did not see it, but this is not blind faith since there are many valid reasons to believe Jesus has risen from the dead.
Blind faith is when you believe something to be true even when the evidence is pointing in the opposite direction. Blind faith is when your eyes are closed to the facts rather than open. Not only can you not see what you hope for, there are no valid reasons for this hope either. As 1 Peter 3:14-15 instructs:
But even if you should suffer for righteousness’ sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you . . . .”
Just as God wants us to see valid reasons for the hope that we have in Christ through faith, so should there be valid reasons for why you believe God is revealing someone to be your future spouse one day. There should be valid evidence like mutual interest, the relationship should be biblical, and you both should have the spiritual maturity to honor Christ if God is truly revealing the one to you.
If this person is not a Christian or they are not interested or there are other important factors missing that would validate this truly is the one God has for you, you are using blind faith if you believe this person is the one.
When God truly reveals the one, this revelation will be supported by reasonable evidence and not just empty hopes.
2. God Will Not Use Subjective Signs that Are Incongruent with the Objective Signs to Reveal The One to You
Many people believe they have valid reasons for why God has revealed the one to them, but on closer inspection these reasons are often very subjective.
Now to clarify, I think you should have some subjective reasoning for why you believe this person is the one. In other words, marriage is a personal choice, therefore you should have personal reasons for why you want to marry someone that are completely subjective.
Problems arise, however, when these subjective signs contradict the objective signs. There should be some congruency between the subjective signs you feel are occurring and the signs everyone can agree are occurring because they are objective and observable.
For example, I think it is unlikely God will reveal the one to you through a dream. However, I don’t think this is impossible. But if you have a dream that you feel is a sign that this is the one but then this person rejects you and says they will never be interested in you romantically, it would be unwise to believer this subjective interpretation of this dream compared to this objective interpretation of reality.
All that to say, signs that are based in your feelings, dreams, thoughts, or personal prayer times are subjective. Again, I’m not saying these are unimportant. You should have personal confirmation from the Lord that this person is the one. But if your personal confirmation does not match with the reality of the relationship, this is not God speaking.
God is in control of reality. When God truly says this person is the one for you, reality will reflect this because God never lies. As Hebrews 6:17-18 (NLT) states:
God also bound himself with an oath, so that those who received the promise could be perfectly sure that he would never change his mind. So God has given both his promise and his oath. These two things are unchangeable because it is impossible for God to lie. Therefore, we who have fled to him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold to the hope that lies before us.”
3. God Will Not Use Other People’s Words and Wishes If They Contradict Your Desires When Revealing The One to You
Certainly God does use other people to help guide us. When you meet the one, it’s ideal that other mature Christians in your life can agree that this is a healthy relationship honoring to the Lord.
However, it’s not God when someone is telling you God told them you would marry someone if you do not want to marry this person or this person does not want to marry you. Marriage is a choice in the Bible for those who want it. God will never tell you to marry someone you don’t want to marry because this does not reflect the love relationship between Jesus and the church, which marriage is to reflect. Christ chooses to love his church and the church chooses to love him (Ephesians 5:21-33). Neither are forced beyond their will.
God will use other people to bring confirmation about the one. God will use other people to bring warnings about someone who is not the one. But God will not use other people to force you to marry someone who you don’t want to marry.
If someone’s personal opinion contradicts your personal desires, your desires trump their desires when it comes to your relationship decisions.
And again, if you are a Christian single person who wants to prepare well for your future marriage, I made AGW University specifically for you. To learn more about these unique biblical courses along with the scholarship opportunity, click here to learn more.