How to Be Less Agitated and Have More Self-Control

Proverbs 29:11

What should you do if you are a Christian who struggles with being agitated and annoyed? What should you do if you struggle with complaining often and getting frustrated easily?

Proverbs 29:11 states, “A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.” In this article, we will discuss 5 ways you can rely on the power of God to make practical changes which can help you be less agitated and annoyed.

If You Want to Be Less Agitated, Address Your Physical Needs

Feelings of agitation and annoyance are sensations rooted in the body. Certainly there can be spiritual warfare, anxious thoughts, or external circumstances triggering these feeling of agitation. But the feeling of annoyance and agitation is a sensation rooted in the body.

Therefore, it makes sense that we address the physical if we want to be less agitated. When you are tired, hungry, or not getting enough exercise, it is very likely you will feel off because your body is not getting what it needs.

Feeling agitated is like the feeling of being hungry. Feelings of hunger serve a purpose. They let you know your body needs more fuel. Likewise, agitation can often serve a practical function and could be letting you know your body is lacking some basic need.

In 1 Timothy 5:23 Paul states, “No longer drink only water, but use a little wine for the sake of your stomach and your frequent ailments.” Here we can see that the Bible encourages natural remedies for problems based in the natural.

To Be Less Agitated, Deal with Issues Before They Subconsciously Bug You and Spill Out on Other People

When you are offended, confused, or hurt by someone, those feelings to not just go away. If we do not address them, they just get buried and will come out in odd ways. One reason people get agitated is because something happened to them earlier in the day and they did not address it properly.

For example, if you have a fight with your spouse on the way to work, and then when you get into work you snap at your coworker but then wonder to yourself why you are so agitated, it’s clear your coworker is not the real problem. You are taking your marital frustrations out on your coworker.

Therefore, one way to be less agitated throughout the day is to relational issues faster when they occur. If your boss is rude, forgive him immediately. Don’t wait to get home, have a fight with you husband because you are still upset about your boss, and then forgive the wrongs. Address the issues as soon as you can so the agitation is rooted out before it has time to build.

Address Hormonal and Chemical Imbalances to the Best of Your Ability, and Then Accept What Cannot Be Changed

Another important step to take is to look at what hormonal or chemical reasons you might be feeling agitated or annoyed. Many times our brains are not producing the right amounts of needed chemicals like serotonin and dopamine.

In cases where there is a deficiency, I believe medication can often be helpful in some cases. You don’t want to run to medication to solve your problems, but again, if you feel a certain way because of a chemical imbalance, it is only logical to address the real issue. Don’t blame Satan or a lack of prayer if your hormones are just off. Certainly spiritual warfare is real and lack of prayer will cause a lack of self-control, but sometimes no matter how much you pray your hormonal issues are still a hormonal issue. Modern medicine is still subject to the sovereignty of God. It is not the be all end all solution, but it something to consider.

While this is something we should look at, we also need to accept our hormones and chemical balances at times as well. If there is nothing that can be done about it, this is not an excuse to sin in agitation. By accepting your feelings, you will be better equipped to be on guard and to put extra effort into acting the way you want rather than acting the way you feel.

Work with Your Personality Traits and Not Against Them

Each of us have unique personality traits. God made each of us the way he wanted to, “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb” (Psalm 139:13). Some of us, for example, are more introverted and some of us are more extroverted.

When we try to act in a way that is not true to our natural personality traits, eventually this charade will catch up to us. If you are more introverted but you are living an extroverted life, you will become agitated because you are around too many people. If you are more extroverted living a more introverted life, you will become agitated because you are not around people enough.

Many times there are morally neutral ways to live our lives. It’s not wrong or right to stay home on Friday night or to go out. But we all need to submit to how we have actually been formed by God. Sure we need to stretch ourselves sometimes, but if you ignore your natural personality traits eventually you will grow angry and frustrated because you are ignoring the way God made you.

Stay Focused on Christ and Not the Problems in the World

Lastly, while agitation and annoyance can certainly be issues solved with practical steps, we must never forget that apart from Christ we can do nothing (John 15:5). One reason many of us grow agitated is because we are focusing too much on earthly problems and not enough on heavenly solutions.

By keeping our minds fixed on Christ, we will keep the perspective we need to overcome all feelings of annoyance and aggravation.