There are things every human needs regardless of age or gender. Whether you are a child or you have been married for 60 years, you need love, respect, and knowledge of the gospel of Jesus Christ.
But in this article, I’m talking specifically about the male heart. What do men specifically need in order to have a fulfilled, meaningful life? While there will be some exceptions to this list for some men, I believe the vast majority of men need to be thriving in these 6 categories of life if they hope to be a complete man as God intends them to be.
And I started a new YouTube channel specifically for Christian single men. If you want to learn more about these 6 categories, I encourage you to click here to subscribe to this new channel.
1. A Living Theology
By “a living theology,” I mean two things. First, a man needs a theology that is actually lived out in his life. A man has a deep thirst to understand the meaning of life. Even when he abandons God and Christian truth, he does so in search of meaning. Christianity provides men with the answers their souls crave. Why did God make us? Why do I struggle with sin? Why is Jesus the only solution? All of these core questions in the heart of a man must be answered theologically.
But again, a man needs this theology to be “living.” Many men have a dead theology because they simply gather information in their mind, filing it away for the next lifeless debate in the comments section or small group gathering. A man will only be fully alive and complete as God intends him to be when he believes Christian truth so deeply that it actually affects the way he lives his daily life.
Right from the beginning of man’s existence, God gave him biblical instructions that were both spiritual but which were to govern his life, “You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die” (Genesis 2:16-17). God taught Adam truth, and Adam’s willingness to follow this truth had immense consequences. Likewise, every man’s willingness to follow God’s truth has immense consequences for him.
There is a second way that a man’s theology must be “living.” He must always be learning, growing, and be humble enough to accept that he doesn’t know everything perfectly already. In this sense his theology is “living” because it is changing and growing. Of course there are fundamental truths that Christian men must never compromise on, which will never change for us. But if we think we’ve arrived at a complete knowledge of God, we will start to backslide.
Theology must not be a destination for a man. It’s a never-ending journey of growth and application.
2. A Dream Worth Dying For
The reason there are so many dead men walking around right now is because our society has brainwashed them to willingly jump onto the assembly line of materialism and comfort: Go to school, party, get a job, sleep around for awhile with as many women as you can, eventually get married, buy a house, haver a few kids, go on some nice vacations, die in a warm bed, and be forgotten forever.
A man was created for so much more than this. Ultimately a man was created by God to glorify him. But in each heart of a man, God has given a unique dream through which God wants that man to bring him glory.
In the beginning, God said, “And God blessed them. And God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth” (Genesis 1:28). This is a clear mandate but how each man fulfills it is not mandated. God is not a micromanager. Each man is made in God’s image, and God is a creator (Genesis 1:1).
Dreaming is a dangerous business because there is no guarantee that your dream will come true. This is why most men don’t dare to dream. They settle for the safety of the assembly line life. But if a man wants to be happy and complete, he doesn’t need to accomplish his dream. No, he just needs to have tried to accomplish his dream. Remember, it’s not just about having a dream or fulfilling a dream. It’s about having a dream worth dying for.
This means you are so invested into this dream that it will cost your time, your relationships, and other good things. It will be a real sacrifice to chase this dream. And there is a high chance you won’t succeed. But you have to try. You might die, you might succeed, but if you don’t try you are dead on the inside already. Trying and failing is not what men should be afraid of. We must fear the failure of never trying at all.
This is a big topic I plan on talking more about on the AGW for Men YouTube channel. So if you want to learn more about this topic, click here to subscribe.
3. A Kingdom to Rule
The difference between a boy and man in the Bible is that a boy is taken care of by others while a man is taking care of others. We all need to go through a healthy season of boyhood. But eventually, to be a man, you have to possess a kingdom that is yours to rule (Genesis 1:28).
When your mother owns the house you live in, when your father is still telling you what to do because he pays your bills, and when you are dependent on others for the food you eat, something in your masculine heart can’t grow.
Only when a man has his own kingdom can he really express the masculine spirit the Lord has given him. It should start small because if it is big right away usually that means someone gave it to him. But when you launch out as a man, you get the joy of building something that you own. It’s your crappy apartment. It’s your beater car. It’s your GPA. It’s your entry-level position. You have the right to defend it or neglect it. You have the right to squander it or multiply it. What happens to it is a direct reflection of the care you provide it.
Without a kingdom to rule, a man remains a boy.
4. A Woman to Pursue
Some men will have the biblical gift of singleness (1 Corinthians 7:7). If you truly have that gift, this desire I will be talking about here will be expressed in a different way. But for the vast majority of men, God designed them to have a specific woman in their life one day. As God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him” (Genesis 2:18).
There is a crisis in this world right now that barely anyone is noticing. Hordes of men are “going their own way.” They are being captivated by persuasive speakers who often rightly identify the problems men are facing, problems formed from a feminist society who hates true masculinity. But while these persuasive speakers are pointing out some real problems that men are facing these days, they are doing a bad job in providing biblical solutions for men. In response to feminist hate, men are being taught to hate women in return. There’s a better way.
Through the gospel of Jesus Christ, men can become true men again and they can learn to lead women back into true femininity. As men, we can’t be followers anymore, bowing to the cancel culture of feminist propaganda. And we can’t be angry men who hate women just like worldly women hate us. No, we need to be strong men who love truth and love women from a Christ-centered ethos.
We can’t leave our women behind and still be good men. God made us to be strong men who can lead, protect, and provide for women. As a man, God made you to pursue a woman. If you reject this calling out of fear and past hurts, you will be an empty, selfish man. It’s not easy to be a man worth following. But this is the calling God has given us as man (Ephesians 5:25).
5. A Squad to Serve With
A lone wolf can be a very strong creature, but the strength of a wolf is directly linked to the strength of his pack. A pack of wolves will always beat a lone wolf.
In the military, there are levels that each soldier is a part of to varying degrees. It’s been broken down differently but basically it starts with a whole army, divided into corps, divided into divisions, divided into companies, divided into platoons, and then divided into squads.
As a man, you need a small company of other Christian men you serve with. You are loyal to these men and these men are loyal to you. You have a common goal in life to glorify God and you help each other accomplish this goal.
As Proverbs 27:17 teaches us, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.”
6. A Family Legacy of Love
The family is in a state of disarray. But this doesn’t change the fact that you as a man were created to be a part of a healthy family. This category for men looks back and forward. Ideally, a man comes from a loving family that was anchored by a good father (Ephesians 6:4). As the father helps the son mature, the son himself starts working towards building his own family once he finds the right woman one day.
Each of these 6 categories have countless subdivisions within them. So much more needs to be said. So if these are topics you want to learn more about, make sure you subscribe to the AGW for Men YouTube channel by clicking here.