Genesis 2:18
There are many biblical steps God will lead you to take that will cause you to finally meet the one he has for you. But before all of these important steps, there is one step that must be taken first. I’m not saying that if you take this one step God will for sure bless you with marriage. What I am saying is that you can’t have a godly, blessed marriage one day without first taking this one step.
That one step is this: Become the type of person you would want to marry.
In this article, I’ll unpack this statement much more thoroughly and give you 3 reasons for why this has to be your first step if you hope to meet the one God has for you one day.
But before I do, I also wanted to quickly let you know that there are only a few hours left to enroll in AGW University. These relationship training courses are not magic, but I do truly believe they have the potential to greatly transform the trajectory of your life if you put in the time and hard work that is required. If you enroll before 11:59pm tonight, you get lifetimes access to all these relationship courses, free access to my newest course about online dating, 3 months of bonus email coaching with me, lifetime access to the private Facebook group which has over 590 other students in it currently, all at the reduced tuition cost. Feel free to click here to learn more before the deadline passes by.
1. When You Become the Type of Person You Would Want to Marry, God Will Move You Out of the “Relationship No Man’s Land”
What do I mean by “type of person?” According to Psalm 139, everyone is unique because God made us all as true individuals. So I’m not talking about those individualistic qualities that come together to form a unique person. I’m talking about those bigger biblical qualities that all mature Christians have. As Christians, we know God has called us to only marry other true believes who are walking with the Lord. As 1 Corinthians 7:39 (NIV) states, “A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.”
If you want to marry a mature Christian who loves God and obeys his word, you have to also be that type of person. One of the main reasons this is so important is because if you want to marry that type of person but you don’t feel you are that type of person, you end up in place where you will remain single indefinitely. This occurs because your inner desire and your external relationship choices are in conflict with one another.
If internally you know you are not yet the type of person who is prepared to be a mature godly spouse, and yet you also have a strong desire to be in a relationship right now, you will be tempted to get into a relationship but you will avoid dating the type of person you would want to marry one day. Internally you will know you will never settle and marry an unbeliever or a lukewarm Christian. And yet you also fear that a passionate Christian who is living for the Lord will not be attracted to you because of your past or because of your current spiritual level. This causes you to date people you will never marry. And in the process of dating these people you will never marry, you are getting dragged further into sin and thus feel even less ready to marry a mature Christian because you feel they would not want to marry you.
All of this leads to getting stuck in what I call “a relationship no man’s land.” You are dating the types of people you won’t marry and you are not dating the types of people you would marry. The only way to break out of this vicious cycle is to focus on your own walk with God first. You have to first become the type of person who you would want to marry if you want to be ready to date and then marry the type of person you know God is calling you to marry one day.
2. You Have to First Become the Type of Person God Wants You to Marry Because If You Don’t, You Won’t Have the Spiritual Eyes and Ears to Spot Your Godly Spouse
When you are filled with the Spirit, it causes you to hear differently, see differently, and live differently. When we are not walking in the Spirit, however, we resort back to our earthly ways. These truths also affect what people we are attracted to and have feelings for. When you are not full of the Spirit you will be much more easily attached to people God does not want you with. But when you are full of the Spirit, he will give you the spiritual eyes and ears to rightly identify the person he wants you with. As Jesus said to Paul as recorded in Acts 26:17-18 (NIV):
I am sending you to them to open their eyes and turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me.”
Yes, this ultimately about our walk with God. But notice that it talks about being “among those who are sanctified by faith in me.” There is a group of people with Christ and a group of people not with Christ. If you want to marry someone who loves God and follows him, you first have to “turn from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me.”
A godly spouse will be found among this group Jesus is referring to here.
3. You Must Become the Type of Person You Would Want to Marry Because People Are Attracted to People Like Them
God made the human heart to need companionship. As Genesis 2:18 famously states, “Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.’”
God made Eve to fit with Adam and God made Adam to fit with Eve. God made them this way because without fitting together they could not experience the togetherness that Adam lacked without Eve. My point is, people seek to be around people that they fit with.
This works in both good and bad ways. Have you ever noticed that when someone starts drifting from the Lord they also stop going to church and stop hanging out with their Christian friends and instead only spend time with the people who are living like them? Likewise, when you are living for the Lord, it’s not enjoyable to spend your time in environments where Christ is being dishonored.
Therefore, if you want to marry a godly spouse, you have to first become a godly spouse. If you don’t “fit” with a godly spouse the relationship won’t work. And when you are walking with the Lord, you will be able to say no to those people you know don’t “fit” with you.
If God has called you to marriage, he has made you and your future spouse to “fit” together.
As I mentioned at the beginning of this article, the deadline to enroll in AGW University will close tonight in just a few hours at 11:59pm. I certainly cannot guarantee that if you enroll in AGW University that God will send you a spouse right away. These training courses are not magic and I would never want to mislead anyone by making them think I know a secret marriage formula.
However, what I can promise you is that if you are in a season of life where you are prepared to work hard and truly study what the word of God says about relationships, you will grow immensely by enrolling in AGW University. And while I would never claim to have a secret marriage formula, I have created a wise blueprint that you can follow to increase your chances of meeting the one God might have for you. I believe so much in the biblical information packed into these courses that I offer a 30-day money back guarantee for anyone not fully satisfied with their experience, no questions asked. Here’s what one my students said about his experience:
I’m taking the Heart Check course now, and just completed Lesson 8. So far it’s answering a lot of questions I didn’t know I had while also posing viewpoints that are proving to be vital in my walk with God. I had a major breakthrough with Jesus earlier today because you explained how I needed to get over one of my ex’s. It ended up leading to a domino effect of doors opening to Jesus and he healed my spirit and soul deeply! So I thank you very much. I’m having fun doing these courses because they’re satisfying a lot of what the Lord wants me to know and act upon.” -Martin
If you enroll before the deadline, which is tonight at 11:59pm, you will get all four relationship training courses, which is a total of 33 in-depth biblical classes. Each class has a video and the content is all in writing as well. In addition to lifetime access to these four courses designed specifically for Christian singles who want to know a biblical path for singleness and dating, you will also get lifetime access to the AGW University private Facebook group. This is where all the students can come together, share their struggles, make new friends, and learn from each other. This group has over 590 students in it thus far.
Also, if you enroll before the deadline I’m giving you three months of bonus email coaching with me for no additional tuition cost. This is where you can share your personal story with me and you and I can create an individualize plan just for you to help you follow the Lord’s leading in your life specifically.
The reduced tuition cost and all the bonuses will expire at 11:59pm tonight.
Again, this is not a magical formula. Rather, this is an invitation to those of you who desire to go the next level and receive specialized relationship training that stems right from God’s word. Click here and you can see all the course content and all the other bonuses I haven’t even mentioned yet. I’ll see you over at AGW University. God bless!
