3 Signs God Is Saying, “Keep Waiting and Don’t Settle”

Here are 3 signs God may be saying, “Keep waiting and don’t settle.”

1. If You’re Beginning to Wonder if Your Biblical Standards Are Too Strict

When the Holy Spirit convicts us to hold firmly to the relationship standards given in God’s word, we instantly have a strong motivation to obey the Spirit’s leading by not compromising. However, over time, especially when the wait becomes longer than we thought it would be, we can begin to second-guess ourselves:

• “Did God really tell me not to date an unbeliever? Maybe I’m being too religious. Maybe God wants me to date a non-Christian so I can be a witness to them.”
• “Maybe it’s enough if someone just says they are a Christian even though they don’t go to church, don’t read their Bible, and don’t have any visible fruit in their life.”
• “I know that person I like doesn’t have a passion for God like I do. But maybe it’s okay as long as they are supportive of me serving in ministry. Maybe we could still be a great couple in marriage.”

Don’t let the wait tempt you into settling for less than God’s best. Have you ever wondered why God didn’t make Adam and Eve at the same time? God knew it would not be good for man to be alone (Genesis 2:18) before he made man without the woman, so why didn’t he just make Eve right when he made Adam? Perhaps God wanted Adam to also know that it was not good for him to be alone.

In other words, perhaps through the wait for his wife, God was increasing Adam’s future enjoyment of his wife. The same could be true for you. By holding biblical standards and not settling, you are also increasing the future enjoyment of your future spouse.

2. If You’re Thinking About Giving Someone a Chance that You Previously Rejected for a Good Reason, God Is Saying, “Keep Waiting and Don’t Settle”

When you read how God brought his people out of Egypt and into the Promised Land, there were numerous accounts of the people grumbling that they should have just stayed in Egypt (Numbers 14:2). The journey to freedom and to their own land was harder than they thought it would be, and this tempted them to idolize their past, forget the abuse they experienced in Egypt, and consider going back to the very place they prayed to be delivered from (Numbers 14:3-4). This can often happen to Christians in singleness who want to be married one day.

We certainly don’t want to equate marriage as the “promised land.” But we also don’t want to ignore the powerful desire to be married which is put there by God himself (1 Corinthians 7:7). Rather than idolize this desire or ignore this desire, one must choose to honor God with this desire.

The reason you rejected those people in the past was because your main concern in life is not your personal happiness but rather glorifying the Lord. Refocus on that truth. Refocus on your mission in life. Marriage is not your mission. Glorifying God is your mission. Hopefully one day you can glorify God through your marriage, but even when you get married, your mission will still be the same as it is right now – to please the Lord.

Don’t settle for a relationship that does not accomplish your main mission in life. Keep waiting. Keep serving. Keep doing what you are called to do right now. When you meet the right person, you will be so glad you waited.

3. If You’ve Met Someone Who Has All the Right Qualities But You Know Deep Down You Don’t Really Like This Person that Much

Settling, for Christians, often comes in the form of pairing with someone who is attractive or charming but who does not love the Lord. But it’s also possible to find someone that does love the Lord but for some reason you lack attraction for this person and you just don’t connect to them in that romantic way.

It’s wise to value their Christian character more than anything else. So give them a chance if you wish you could like them. Sometimes your feelings will grow for someone. But if they don’t, don’t settle. God will not ask you to marry someone who is a very mature Christian but who is also someone you just don’t love in that romantic way.

When you meet the right person, it will be biblical and personally desirable (Song of Solomon 1:15-16).