4 Reasons God Is Allowing Your Heart to Ache for Someone

Hebrews 12:11

Here are 4 reasons God is allowing your heart to ache for someone.

And I also wanted to quickly let you know about a unique set of courses I’ve created at AGW University. These courses are not for people in a dating relationship, they’re not for married people, and they’re not for those of you who want to be single your whole life.

Rather, these courses are for those of you who feel in your heart that God has probably wired you for marriage but you are still single right now.

And for those of you who enroll before the deadline of August 23rd at 11:59pm, I’m also giving you a bundle of bonus courses for free, access to the private Facebook group that has over 945 other members in it currently, 3 months of one-on-one email coaching with me, and a scholarship.

For more information, click here to visit AGW University.

1. You Ache for that Person Because God Is Using This Person to Highlight Your Need for Christ

Every need eventually finds its deepest roots in God. This doesn’t mean your ache for this person isn’t really about this person. These feelings you have about this person are not just symbolic signposts pointing back to God. Human relationships are valuable and important too.

However, while these feelings about this person really are about this person, at your heart’s deepest level, the ache you feel is not solely for this person but rather for God. Yes, a human lover is a real blessing from the Lord (Proverbs 18:22). But the good in this world is always a reflection of the goodness of God. Thus, every unmet longing in the heart for something good is really our heart’s cry for God.

God does have something to say to you about this person. Perhaps he will lead you to move on or perhaps he will bring you two together. But he never wants you to waste your pain. All pain is meant to be motivation to draw us closer to the loving, all satisfying presence of God (Psalm 16:2, 11).

2. You Ache for that Person Because God Doesn’t Want You to Let Them Go

Sometimes God gives you a gift like a present under the Christmas tree, “Here you go, my child!”

At other times, however, God requires us to go out and fight for the blessing he has for us. One example of this can be seen when it comes to the Promise Land God wanted to give to his people. Yes, God was giving it to them (Joshua 1:2); but he also required them to fight for it (Joshua 8:1).   

Likewise, while God will give you a spouse if he’s called you to marriage, there will also be times where you will need to fight for this relationship. Perhaps you will need fight through your own passivity. Perhaps you will have to fight through a misunderstanding between you and this person. Or perhaps you both will have to fight through fears and wounds holding you back as a couple.

If there’s a deep ache in your heart for someone, this could be a sign God is telling you to fight for this relationship.

3. You Ache for This Person Because God Is Healing You and Helping You Move On

While God could require you to push through the barriers blocking this relationship, it’s also possible God is truly calling you to move on. But how? How can you let someone go when you have such strong feelings for this person?

The process will be painful; but with the Lord, anything is possible. Have you ever been badly injured? The injury is not the only painful part. The healing can actually be very painful too. When new bone or tissue start to grow back, it will hurt. When you have to go through physical therapy to regain the strength that you lost, this will be painful.

But if you stick with it, the ache begins to lessen and your health returns. Healing can be slow and painful, but those who are faithful to follow the Lord will get through it much faster than those who run and hide.

Hebrews 12:11, “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”

4. You Ache for This Person Because God Is Using This Experience to Give You the Training You Need for When You Meet The One

You might find it impossible to imagine yourself with anyone but this one person. However, if this person is not the one for you, you will one day be amazed at God’s loving “no” to you.

Sometimes God’s “no” becomes our favorite answered prayer. When you experience the goodness God has planned for you, then you will be so happy he didn’t give you what you thought you wanted back then.

Job suffered much, but in the end, it states, “And the Lord gave Job twice as much as he had before . . . And the Lord blessed the latter days of Job more than his beginning” (Job 42:10-12).

When you finally meet the person God does have for you, you will see the purpose for this pain that you are experiencing right now. It’s okay to ache for this person you are thinking about in your heart. But remember that God is somehow in it. Whether this person is the one or not, always trust the Lord.

When you follow the Lord in the present, the pleasure you will find in the future will always outweigh the pain you had to go through in the past.

If you want more relationship training from me, you might really enjoy AGW University:

  • In the course called Heart Check, we study what the Bible says about healing, moving on from past relationships, and preparing your heart for the one.
  • In the course called Marriage Material, we learn what the Scriptures tell us to look for in a spouse.
  • In the course called 10 Steps to Meet The One, we talk about extremely practical steps you can take to meet the person God has for you.

And for those of you who enroll before the deadline, which is August 23rd at 11:59pm, I’m also giving you all of my other courses for free. You will also receive three months of one-on-one email coaching with me for no additional tuition cost.

For more information, along with a scholarship opportunity, click here to visit AGW University.

Published by

Mark Ballenger

ApplyGodsWord.com is the writing ministry of Mark Ballenger. To reach Mark, send him an email anytime: markballenger@applygodsword.com