5 Things God Will Do When He’s Highlighting a Woman He Wants You to Date

Here are 5 things that often happen when God is highlighting a woman that he wants you to be with.

1. If Your Paths Keep Crossing So You Have the Opportunity to Pursue Her, God Could Be Highlighting Her to You

A man has the free will to reject or accept the opportunities given to him. However, only God can initially give a man those opportunities in the first place. For you to first make the choice to pursue a woman, God must first sovereignly arrange to bring this woman into your life and allow you the circumstances to pursue her.

For example, while Boaz and Ruth both made important choices to be with each other, God is the one who directed Ruth to come to Bethlehem in the first place (Ruth 1:22). She was originally from Moab. Without God’s sovereign leading, these two would never have met (Ruth 2:3).

Likewise, if a woman is in your life, meaning she goes to your church, works where you work, goes to the same college, hangs out with the same people you do – if she is somehow in your life and you have the opportunity to pursue her, this is the first prerequisite needed to know if God is truly highlighting a woman to you.

2. If You Two Produce Good Fruit When You Spend Time Together, This Is a Good Sign God Is Highlighting Her to You

Just because you like a woman who is in your life does not mean God is the one highlighting her to you. And even if she is a genuine Christian woman who has great qualities, this still does not mean God is highlighting her to you. To really know if God is highlighting her to you, you must look at the effect that occurs when you two spend time together.

Does she try to avoid you when you try to speak with her? Do you two have a sexual tension that leads you into sin? Are you discouraging to each other because you don’t know how to express romantic interest like adults? Are you both participating in worldliness together because you don’t know how else to relate to each other? These are all bad signs.

When God is truly highlighting a woman to you, your time with her will result in good spiritual and practical fruit. You will encourage each other, you will serve others together, you will be helping each other’s walk with God, and so on.

As 2 Timothy 2:22 instructs, “So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.” If can obey this verse with this woman, God may be highlighting her to you in the romantic sense.

3. If You Both Are Individually Better When You Are Together, This Is Good Sign God Is Highlighting This Woman to You

When you become a couple, you don’t lose your individuality. Yes, in marriage, the two should becomes one. But within marriage, you both retain your human autonomy and personhood. So rather than thinking of you two becoming only one entity in marriage, you are really forming a new thing together as individuals.

In other words, when you are with the right woman, you won’t be so consumed with her that you lose yourself. Rather, you two will be able to help each other live from your true identities in Christ. As Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 states:

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”

When you and woman are both better off together, that is a great sign the Lord is highlighting her to you.

4. If You Are Noticing Her for the Right Reasons, This Is a Good Sign the Lord Is Highlighting Her to You

Some men think God is highlighting a woman to him but really it is just that he finds her particularly attractive. You should like the way a woman looks before pursuing her romantically. Physical attraction is an important element. It’s just not “the most” important element (1 Peter 3:3-6).

As Proverbs 31:30 (NIV) explains, “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”

5. If God Seems to Be Highlighting You to Her, This Could Be a Sign He Is Also Highlighting Her to You

Without this point in the equation, none of the other points really matter. You might think God is allowing you two to cross paths because he’s highlighting her to you. You might think you two produce good fruit together. You might think you both are better individually when you are together.

But if she doesn’t also think these things, it doesn’t matter how you feel about it. It has to be mutual for it to really work. Sure, it could take her more time to like you than it did for you to start liking her. And yet, this truth remains: It’ has to be mutual for it to be biblical (Genesis 24:58).

Therefore, you have to sense in her that she is noticing you too. Is she acting interested, wanting to know more about your spiritual beliefs and testimony? Does she seem to like being around you, looking for something more with you?

If so, then perhaps God really is highlighting this woman to you.

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