4 Biblical Signs God Is Saying, “It’s Not Good for You to Be Alone”

Throughout the Scriptures, it’s very clear that some are called to singleness and some are called to marriage (see 1 Corinthians 7).

Singleness is not second place. If you want to be single, that is a strong sign you have the gift of singleness.

However, for those who are called to marriage, there is a season before marriage where it is not good for them to be married yet. And then something happens where it is good for them to be married.

So in this article, I’ll discuss 4 biblical things that often mean God is saying, “It’s not good for you to be alone.”

1. When You Are Content in God, That’s When God Might Be Telling You to Seek Marriage

The most direct verse we have on this topic comes in Genesis 2:18, which states, “Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.’”

To really appreciate this verse, we need to pay attention to the first word “Then.” God said this in a particular order of events, not just as a general statement.

Big picture, Genesis 2:18 comes in the context of Adam being right with God and without sin. Adam and Eve sinned in Genesis 3. And in Genesis 1, we know that God made Adam and said it was good (Genesis 1:31). Thus, when God said it was not good for Adam to be alone in Genesis 2, this was not a statement about Adam lacking something in God.

In fact, we can conclude that the reason it was not good for Adam to be alone was that he was right with God. Whenever God is present, life is produced. When Adam was alone, he could not experience the full blessing of bearing the communal nature (expressed in the Trinity) and life-giving power of God (expressed through creation). Remember, Adam and Eve were made in God’s image (Genesis 1:27). Thus, to bear God’s image accurately, they needed each other so they could live in community and create life together.

Therefore, we can say that when you are right with God and content in him, that’s when you are most ready to get married. If you have some lack in you that was meant to be satisfied in God, but you are seeking to get it satisfied through marriage, that’s not biblical.

You’re biblically ready to no longer be alone when you are content in God even though you are unmarried. That doesn’t mean you have to be content “with” your singleness. You can want to be married. But it does mean you are still satisfied in God. You are able to be content “in” singleness because your heart is full of Christ.

2. When You Know Your Purpose, That’s When God Might Be Telling You to Seek Marriage

Let’s focus again on that word “Then” at the beginning of Genesis 2:18. While this takes place in the larger context of Adam being right with God still, this verse’s immediate context takes place directly after Genesis 2:15-17, which state:

The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it. And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, ‘You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”

Right after these verses, Genesis 2:18 states, “Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.’”

Thus, we can say that one sign you are ready for marriage is that you know what work God has called you to do. Before God gave Adam a spouse, he gave him a job, “The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it.” And remember, while Adam had a specific task given to him here, ultimately this was just an expression of his ultimate task of bearing God’s image (Genesis 1:27).

If you are aimless in life, you’re not ready to get married. If you get a spouse without first getting on mission, you will make your spouse your purpose in life. At first, this will feel great. But over time, you will realize a person is not a big enough mission. And your spouse will feel the pressure you are putting on them.

To thrive as a couple, you both need to know your purpose. Of course, our specific jobs and tasks in life are always changing. But the overall mission of glorifying God by bearing his image will always be our purpose. Only when you know your purpose will God say to you, “It’s not good for you to be alone anymore.”

3. When You’re Obeying the Basic Commands in the Bible, That’s When God Might Be Telling You to Seek Marriage

Point 2 was really referring to Genesis 2:15. Now let’s highlight what God said in Genesis 2:16-17, which also come right before Genesis 2:18 where God said it was not good for Adam to be alone:

And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, ‘You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”

Only after God gave Adam the rules for his home did he then say it was not good for Adam to be without a wife. A home without biblical guidelines becomes a prison. God’s rules are not meant to restrict us from fun and pleasure. They are to protect us from pain.

People ask me all the time, “How will I know I’m ready for marriage?” There are a lot of ways to answer that question. But the first and most basic answer is that you must be seeking to obey the commands in the Bible. If you aren’t walking with God in singleness, you won’t magically start walking with God in marriage.

You don’t need to be a perfect person to get married. But if you want to be blessed in marriage, you must be repenting of sin, seeking to walk in the light as all true Christians do (1 John 1:5-10).

4. When You Have Desires that Can Only Be Satisfied Through Marriage, That’s When God Might Be Telling You to Seek Marriage

Genesis 2 is the zoomed-in perspective of how God brought Adam and Eve together. But in Genesis 1, we have a zoomed-out perspective. After God made Adam and Eve, Genesis 1:28 says, “And God blessed them. And God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it . . .”

And in Genesis 2:24-25, it also says, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”

Thus, in these verses we see God-given desires that can only be fulfilled in marriage. In fact, Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7:36-38 that if you lack certain desires that can only be fulfilled in marriage, you are called to singleness.

Therefore, if you want to have sex in a way that pleases God, and if you have a desire to love God through forming your own family with a spouse, this is a sign God is saying, “It’s not good for you to be alone.”