Psalm 34:18
Why hasn’t God healed your broken heart yet? Here are 4 possible reasons.
And I wanted to quickly thank Faithful Counseling for sponsoring this article. As we’ll talk about later on in this article, sometimes our inner healing is being delayed because we need help from others.
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1. God May Have Not Healed Your Heart Yet Because He Is Still Using This Pain to Transform You and Prepare You for a Better Relationship in the Future
Many times God uses pain to teach us because we so often miss his invitations to learn in less hurtful ways.
While God certainly will spare us of unnecessary pain, he will not spare us of necessary pain. Necessary pain always has a purpose. Necessary pain always accomplishes something worth the suffering we go through. If the joy and transformation at the end of the road is greater than the suffering we will experience on the road, God will have us travel down that road for our good and his glory.
All that to say, God could be delaying your healing from a broken heart because he’s not done using this pain to totally transform you. He could also be using this pain from a relationship heartache to prepare you for a better relationship in the future. Without transformation, however, we are often doomed to experience the same trials and heartaches again.
In love, God will not let us move on until he has accomplished everything he wants to accomplish through this brokenness. Therefore, the faster you learn what God wants you to learn, oftentimes this will cause you to find your healing in the Lord faster too.
Pray as David did in Psalm 51:10, “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.”
2. You Could Be Delaying God’s Healing If You Are Reopening the Wound By Being Around the Person Who Wounded You or By Experiencing Similar Situations Too Soon
Most of the time, a broken heart is directly connected to a specific person that you really cared about but then for whatever reason this person and you did not end up being together long-term. When this occurs, seeing this person can agitate your brokenness and thus slow your healing process with Jesus.
Additionally, sometimes a broken heart occurs because of an accumulation of hurtful experiences. If multiple people have wounded you in small ways, these small wounds can act like one big wound. When this occurs, small experiences that add to the many cuts on your heart can agitate your brokenness and thus slow your healing process with the Lord.
Therefore, when you know you have a broken heart, you often need to remove the people who have wounded you or try to minimize the hurtful experiences for a while so you have time to get strong again in the Lord.
We will never be able to fully insulate ourselves from all dangers if we hope to love and be loved in this life. But sometimes we need to call a timeout in our lives to give our hearts a moment to breathe and heal with the Lord.
Jeremiah 29:13 states, “You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.” Sometimes we need to remove everything that is hindering us from fully seeking the Lord with all our hearts so we can then find him and his healing.
3. God May Have Actually Healed Your Heart Already But You Have Not Yet Accepted This Healing and Chosen to Move On
When Jesus healed the man in John 5, verses 8-9 state, “Jesus said to him, ‘Get up, take up your bed, and walk.’ And at once the man was healed, and he took up his bed and walked.” For a healing to be experienced, we need to get up and walk, showing the faith that we believe we truly are healed.
When God heals us from a relationship wound, we won’t experience this healing until we decide to believe that God has truly healed us. Sometimes God has already exposed the lies we believed and helped us break the agreements with those lies. Sometimes God has reminded us of his love for us and our hearts have felt the restoring sweetness of the Holy Spirit’s tender presence. But then we sit and remain on the ground as though we are not healed when we actually are. Sometimes the thing holding us back is our own refusal to get up and walk again.
At other times, we did get up because we knew God actually did heal us, but overtime we forget his healing and lose sight of his restoration. It’s so easy to forget what God has already done for us, which is why we are told to actively remember his healing in our lives. As Psalm 103:2-5 states:
Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.”
Take time to remember God’s healing. Sometimes the wounds from your past will speak to you, but all you need to do is keep walking and remind yourself that God has already healed those wounds.
4. God May Be Waiting for You to Ask Someone for Help Because Sometimes God Uses Other People to Bring His Healing to Our Hearts
Sometimes the fog is too thick and we can’t see the way out of our despair. This is when we need a good friend to take us by the hand and lead us into God’s truth.
Sometimes we need tough love too. We need a friend to lovingly point out our flaws that our hindering our healing (Proverbs 27:6).
And other times we just need a shoulder to lean on to help us walk forward into God’s healing. As Proverbs 27:9 states, “Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.”
Ideally we would all have friends, mentors, and wise Christians in our lives who can help counsel us when we need it. But life isn’t perfect and sometimes we don’t have this healthy community we need. If you don’t have access to wise counsel but you sense you need to talk with someone, you may benefit from Faithful Counseling. For more information feel free to click here.