Well this is kind of awkward.
Anytime you hear the word “masturbation” in a sermon, a small group, or just in the presence of another human, all kinds of uncomfortable things start to happen. The room goes quiet, faces get red, throats are cleared as people shift in their seats, we all avoid eye-contact, and everyone tries to act like they didn’t just hear that word.
Awkward or not, as Christians this is a topic we can’t ignore. Our churches and community circles are filled with people who silently struggle with this sin, too embarrassed to seek the help they wish they could find.
Perhaps you are someone who struggles with masturbation. Or perhaps you have no clue why this is a temptation for people but would like to be someone others can confide in and get advice from. Either way, here are five practical pointers that will help Christians overcome the sin of masturbation.
1. Realize the Bible Actually Does Condemn Masturbation
You’ve probably heard that the word “masturbation” is found nowhere in Scripture, which is absolutely true. Therefore when most people explain why masturbation is a sin, they focus on the lustful thoughts and intentions that are almost always associated with self-pleasure.
But just because the Bible does not directly condemn masturbation does not mean it has not been forbidden indirectly. Oftentimes authors in the Bible speak in categories rather than in specifics. So rather than listing every possible sexual act that could be sinful, the Bible gives us general boundaries in which we are to remain.
To the married 1 Corinthians 7:5 states, “Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” To the single 1 Corinthians 7:9 explains, “But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.”
These two verses give us one sexual category for both the married and the single that encompasses all condoned sexual acts: All sexual activity must include the physical presence of your spouse.
Masturbation is indirectly condemned through what is expressly condoned. Notice Paul says that if you are married and perform a sexual act away from your spouse, you have fallen to Satan’s temptation because of your lack of self-control. If you are single and perform any sexual act (because you don’t have a spouse), here again Paul says you are showing that you cannot control yourself because you are indulging in sexual activity meant for marriage alone.
Since masturbation is done away from your spouse, the Bible categorizes it as sin. You can’t stop masturbating if you are not convinced it is sinful. Therefore, the first step in stopping this sin is to be firmly convinced that the Bible does condemn this act.
(For a deeper look at what the Bible says about masturbation, read the article, “Does the Bible Say Masturbation Is Sin?)
2. Don’t Use Weird Mental Tactics to Justify This Sin
The act of masturbation always starts in the mind. Even if you’ve never heard the biblical logic expressed in point 1, we all know subconsciously masturbation is a sin. To get around this, people often use odd arguments in their heads to justify why they are indulging in self-pleasure.
I’ve talked to single people who have learned how to masturbate while “thinking about nothing,” thus they feel they are not lusting, which in their minds makes self-pleasure okay. I’ve heard of people who justify masturbation by stating it helps them to not commit worse sexual sins like looking at porn or having premarital sex. I know married men who feel that as long as they are thinking about their wife when they masturbate, then it is alright in God’s eyes.
There are countless weird arguments we could try to use to justify masturbation. But in the eyes of God, sin is sin. Keep it simple and just obey at face-value your conscience, the Spirit’s leading, and the Bible’s instructions.
3. Look Ahead to the Reward
To overcome any temptation, we need to not only resist evil but also pursue what is good. Romans 12:21 says, “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”
If you are single and desire to overcome masturbation, you have to firmly believe that your self-control and self-sacrifice now will result in greater pleasure in the future. You must learn to not only resist the temptation but to pursue the pleasure that stems from pleasing God. Additionally, masturbation will lessen your delight in sex once you get married. The more you resist sexual temptation now, the greater your sexual experiences with your future spouse will be later. And more than that, the more you resist sin in general, the greater your experience of God will be.
4. Don’t Underemphasize the Practical Stuff
Are you more tempted to masturbate late at night? Stop staying up so late. Do R-rated movies plant seeds of sexual sin in you that feed your sinful nature? Stop watching these types of movies. Does going to the beach or the gym cause you to see the opposite sex in scanty clothing? Don’t go to these places anymore.
Identify any triggers and cut them out. Fighting masturbation is a spiritual battle, but don’t underestimate the practical stuff either.
5. Remember Who You Are in Christ
The process of sanctification is directly tied to our willingness to embrace the effects the gospel has had on us. When we become a Christian, we are made into a new creation with desires to please God (2 Corinthians 5:14-21). We must now spend the rest of our lives learning to embrace our new identify and reject our old nature.
If you want to overcome the temptation to masturbate, you must trust your Bible over your feelings. Preach the truth to yourself, “I’m a new creation in Christ. I don’t want to sin like this. I want to please God now.” The more deeply you believe that you are a new person who craves purity rather than promiscuity, the more your actions will begin to change.
If you are a Christian, you are a new creation. Now you just need to believe it and live from this truth.
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Hello sir, my name is Landon Hayes, and this is the first time coming across your site. I want to thank you for the help and clarity
You are very welcome. I’m glad you enjoy the site. God bless,
Mark
thank you so much i am a girl and a christian but i am masturbating since childhood i tried a lot but all in vain i have noticed every time i masturbate something bad happens to me and i was fed up as it affected my 10 class result god was punishing me for my sins and i don’t want to let that happen again please pray for me so that god forgive me…..
I will pray for you. Also, here is a link to a free eBook I have about overcoming sexual temptation. I hope it blesses you.
https://applygodsword.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/Redeemed-Like-David-PDF-Version-Mark-Ballenger.pdf
In Christ,
Mark
Hello sir…my name is brother Tumelo.I am single.And this is my first time subscribing to your website.its helping me a lot.I am struggling to quit masturbation.Can the Lord restore back my sexually desire to enjoy fulfillment of sex in the marriage if I turn back to Him?And have I lost my virginity through masturbating?
Really great to hear from you and I am so happy AGW is benefiting you. Thank you for your questions.
I truly believe the Lord can restore your sexual desire in marriage. I believe one of the main reasons people lose sexual desire in marriage is because they indulge in masturbation and porn use. Sexual desire is spiritual, but it is also biological. If your body has regular sexual release outside of marriage, their will be no desire left for the marriage. But if you don’t indulge in other forms of sexual activity, you will have greater physical attractions to your wife.
While I believe masturbation is sin and has consequences, I don’t believe masturbation is the same thing as sex with another person. Therefore I don’t believe you have lost your virginity. However, I would caution you if you consider yourself more or less pure based upon your virginity. Read this article for more on sexual purity: https://applygodsword.com/sexual-purity-how-the-church-often-gets-it-wrong/
I hope these answers help you a bit. God bless,
Mark
Masurbation is sin (Corinthians 5:14-21)
thank you sir, my name is Kanyimi Paul, its my first time to connect to you and am blessed. please pray for me. i need freedom from this sin of masturbation. no: +237655457262 Cameroon.
Keep praying and fighting my brother, God will train you. It will take time, but if you don’t give up you will find the freedom you seek.
God bless,
Mark
Thanks for the post. I was able to overcome sexual sin by God’s grace.i have made available resource to help anyone struggling with sexual immorality.visit; http://battlesofachristian.com/overcome-sexual-immorality/
Nice, thanks for sharing brother, God bless,
-Mark
Thank you sir for these insights. Have been under the influence of masturbation and sexual sins for over 5 years now. I know it’s a sin unto God and sin against my own body. But i have been finding it difficult to come out of it. Recently, God has been helping me. I no longer indulge in it, but the devil on 3 occasions has through dreams made me to masturbate. It is because of my earnest desire to come out of this mess that made me to read up articles that could be helpful. Thank God I read yours.
My mentor who has been engaging me in practical principles has helped me to some extent overcome the physical masturbation. But sir, have come to realised just as you pointed out that masturbation is more spiritual than physical.
Secondly, right now I’m in a setting that is helpful to me. I still have doubts that I may fall into it when I leave my present environment. This has happened severally to me.
Please sir, what more can I do to be sure that I have been fully delivered. Please never forget me in your prayers. The devil has eaten deeply into me that I can’t bear it anymore. I want to live upright and blameless like Job.
We can never assume we are unable to sin in a certain way. My advice is to keep doing what’s working. Don’t let your guard down and don’t assume you have conquered something so much that you could never do it again. We are totally free in Christ, but the flesh can take over at any moment, so we must actively pursue Jesus all the time.
God bless,
-Mark
Hi sir.. thank u sir
I am a girl.. i am trying 2 stop this for along time.. but everytime i decide not to do I keep on falling on the sin. And the guilt that is within me is terrible.. I really wanted to be closer to God.. but I keep doing this sin again & again
Please pray for me that I may overcome & become more closer to god.. I need to be free from this sin
Thank you, please pray for me to stop this horrible habbit
I just prayed for you,
-Mark
I just prayed for you. Also, you should look at other areas of your life. This sin is usually not the root issue. Usually it is used as a coping mechanism for other issues, problems, or wounds. I would talk with a wiser older Christian or perhaps even a counselor so you can address any other areas that may be hindering you.
-Mark
hello brother,
please help me to come out of this sin, it really hurts my feeling. Sometimes I think that God won’t forgive me.can u give me some advice to come out of it?
hello brother,
brother, I need your help to come out of this sin.i have been trying a lot of ways but nothing benefited me.will god forgive me for this sin?.
please pray for me to stop this habit and even for my exams. please pray for me that I have to do well my exams and score nice marks and to stop this habit
I encourage you to talk with a pastor. Perhaps the problem is that you are too isolated and you need accountability from a local church. I have lots of tips all over my website. I hope they help you, God’s grace is always enough,
-Mark
Uncle iam not able to stop this habit so pl pry 4 me
Am Esther Please s pray along with me to come out of this habit.
I just prayed for you.
-Mark
Hello,
I really need help with my addiction, How can I talk with someone?
Thanks,
I would recommend talking with your pastor or contacting a local Christian counselor.
please pray for me I could feel the holy spirit telling me to stop but cannot overcome the temptation.
I just prayed for you,
-Mark
Hey there. I came across this site about 3 weeks ago where I then went up until today without masturbating, although coming close at times. But, like I said, I finally fell into this sin again. I never usually post comments on pages like this, but after falling back into this sin today I have decided to anyway. There are some convincing arguments about whether masturbatuon is a sin, so my problem is that whenever I feel the urge to do this sin, I always think of the many website and articles saying it is ok, until, of course, afterwards. I have rewatched your video many times and would like to thank you for it. I am definitiley getting closer to conquering this sin for good, and much of it due to this website, and obviously our amazing god. I will make sure to keep checking into to this website and even videos on the YouTube channel to see what else it has to offer. Thank you so much -Sidney (male, just in case you couldn’t tell for whatever reason lol)
So glad this has been helpful brother. Keep fighting. Our victory is in Christ and the more we walk with him the more this victory will manifest in our living. God bless!
-Mark
hello I understand about staying away from places that cause me to sin What do I do in my every day living work, food shopping or just walking back and forth to work and home. How do you stop your mind from looking at women lustfully Any body part of a women I lust over from the calves up to the eyes and everything in between. I have no church family every church i been to here is Libreal or Catholic I been serious thinking about going to Catholic Church I need to break this chain of bondage of lust and masterbation Please Please guide me help
dave
Hello sir, I just read your article now and I want to stop masturbation badly but I keep doing it. I don’t want to tell anyone I know cause they’ll be very disappointed in me. Please pray for me that as from today, I’ll stop this deadly sin.
I just prayed for you and I encourage you to keep fighting. Replace the bad with the good. Focus on what you want in Christ.
God bless,
-Mark
Although I am trapped in this sin, here is an example of why I believe masturbation is wrong and a sin.
In Genesis 38 there is a story of a man by the name of Onan. (7) And Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the Lord, and the Lord slew him.
Now under the Law, when a brother died and left no offspring then the next brother was to go in and try to produce offspring to keep the family name alive.
Genesis 38:8-10 And Judah said unto Onan, Go in unto thy brother’s wife, and marry her, and raise up seed to thy brother. (9) And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother’s wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother. (10) And the thing which he did displeased the LORD: wherefore he slew him also.
There are many scriptures against this sin, this is just one example.