10 Dating Tips Satan Uses to Prevent Your Godly Marriage

Rather that performing a demonic manifestation, the devil knows it is more effective to smuggle in hurtful ideas through other people (Revelation 2:9). This is particularly relevant when it comes to relationship advice.

Therefore, here are 10 worldly dating tips Satan will use to try to keep you from ever getting into a godly marriage that glorifies the Lord.

1. “Everything Will Be Easy When It’s True Love”

This bad advice comes in many forms. Some people say, “When you meet the one, it won’t be so hard,” or “When it’s God’s will, things will just happen naturally.”

There’s an element of truth here. When it’s God’s will, you shouldn’t need to knock down doors that are clearly shut. When God wants something to happen, only then will it actually happen.

But in another sense, this advice is really unbiblical and leads people to think there is a perfect person out there. Whenever there is a problem, people assume, “This must mean this is not the right person for me.”

It really depends on what the problem is and what effect this problem is having on you (Matthew 7:20). If this problem is actually being used by God to mature you and bring you and someone closer together, this is a good sign, not a bad sign (Ephesians 4:29).

2. “Don’t Respond Too Fast When a Man Contacts You” (for Women) or “Don’t Seem Too Interested in a Woman” (for Men)

Too be balanced, sometimes you should be more guarded and wait to share your excitement. At other times you should show your full emotions. It all depends on the actual relationship at hand.

However, adults should just be honest. It’s childish to play this worldly game of “Who’s going to show their cards first?” If a guy texts you and you like him, don’t overthink it. Text him back right when you see his text. If you are a man who likes a woman, keep it simple and pursue her by showing your interest.

If you need to play games for someone to like you, you are getting off on the wrong foot right from the start (Ephesians 4:15).

3. “Just Follow Your Heart”

Satan loves this phrase because it can so easily be taken out of context. In one way, it is biblical to say, “Follow your heart.” According to Scripture, through the gospel, Jesus gives us a new heart with new desires so we can follow the Holy Spirit properly (Ezekiel 36:26-27). So in that sense, you should follow your heart. However, the Bible also says the human heart is completely wicked (Jeremiah 17:9). You should never follow your old, sinful heart.

Thus, when people hear the advice of “Just follow your heart,” they often interpret this to mean, “Just do what you feel like doing.” That is terrible advice. Our feelings are important, but we must never follow our feelings. We must confirm that we have the proper feelings before dating someone. But we must lead our feelings into truth by using our minds (Romans 12:2).

4. “You’re So Young. Just Have Fun Right Now”

It’s still possible to meet a godly Christian single person even when you are “not young” anymore. However, it’s foolish to pretend that it’s not much harder to meet godly Christian singles when you get older.

Dating advice given to younger Christians that encourages them to not take relationships seriously is satanic. Wasting romantic energy in your youth with people who are not marriage material will make it much harder to actually get married one day to a godly spouse (Psalm 119:9).

It’s never going to be easier to meet a Christian spouse than when you are young. Again, if you are older, this is not to say you can’t meet someone. It’s just a fact that it’s easier to meet other Christian singles when you are younger.

5. “You Have to Go on a Test Drive Before You Buy”

Whenever I post content about the dangers of premarital sex, I can’t tell you how many times people have commented this ridiculous statement about needing to test drive someone before knowing if you want to marry them. “What if the sex is bad?” they ask, as though this is an irrefutable argument that nullifies God’s command to avoid premarital sex (1 Corinthians 7:1-9).

The fact is, a person is not a material object compromised of pieces and parts that need to be operated like a car. “Pull this lever, push this button, and boom, you will have great sex in marriage!” That is total nonsense! That mindset comes from this porn-saturated culture that is the devil’s playground.

Sex is meant to be an expression of love between a husband and wife. If you two love each other, it will be impossible to have bad sex in marriage. It’s not love to think of someone as a sexual object to be operated for your selfish reasons.

6. “When You Meet The One, It Will Be Love at First Sight”

I think it’s possible for God to give you a strong emotional attachment to someone right when you meet them. This could happen to you when you first meet your future spouse.

But I don’t believe in “love at first sight.” For true romantic love to take place, you have to actually know someone. Otherwise, you are just imagining a false version of someone that doesn’t exist. You are filling in all the information gaps with what you hope to be true. Usually love at first sight is really just infatuation at first sight.

1 Peter 5:8, “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” Love at first sight flies in the face of this warning. Satan love’s idolatry and infatuation because they cause us to lose our godly sobriety and ignore God’s leading.

7. “Never Settle”

Sure, never settle. But what do you actually mean by that?

If you mean you shouldn’t marry someone you don’t want to marry, then, “Amen, never settle!” But if you mean, “Stick to your list. If this person isn’t exactly who you imagined, if they don’t have all the things you want, if things aren’t perfect, then they are not the one,” then this is unbiblical thinking.

Sometimes your list of requirements has really become a list of barriers blocking you from loving a real person. Never compromise on the biblical requirements for a spouse. But be open to someone who isn’t what you expected.

Though God’s plan is often different than our plan, it is always better (Ephesians 3:20-21)!

8. “You Need to Be Completely Healed Before You Get Into a Relationship”

Satan loves a perfectionist mindset because it prevents God’s people from ever doing anything meaningful.

You should reach a healthy level of maturity and healing before dating and marrying. However, oftentimes this level is much lower than Christians think. You don’t need to be “completely healed” or “totally ready” for a relationship. If you wait that long, you will never be ready.

The truth is, sanctification is an ongoing process (Hebrews 10:14). A loving marriage is about healing and growing together. You don’t need to be perfect to find true love.

9. “Don’t Be So Judgmental”

“Who we are to judge?” Well, technically speaking, according to the Scriptures, there are different forms of judgement. Judging motives is bad. Judging actions is good.

It’s not the sinful form of judgement to observe someone’s actions and words and make logical conclusions about them (Matthew 7:20). God actually does tell us to judge what they are doing and saying (2 Timothy 3:8-9). We just can’t know why they did or said that (1 Samuel 16:7, Matthew 7:1).

Satan will tempt you into bad relationships and keep you away from your godly spouse if you think it’s wrong to assess someone’s external choices through a biblical lens.

10. “Don’t Waste Time! Figure Out If You Two Are Compatible Right Away”

“How many kids do you want? Where do you see yourself in five years? How fast are you looking to get married?”

Yes, these are important questions. You should be headed in the same direction in life when you get married to someone.

However, if you treat someone you just met like they are being interviewed for a job, you are sabotaging the connection right from the start.

For example, once you get to know someone, you may realize you are willing to move to a different state to be with them. Or maybe they will realize they are willing to stay in this state to be with you.

If you both are unwilling to compromise on something important, then it’s not meant to be. But to assume you know the distant future before giving someone the slightest chance with you – this will be used by Satan to keep you away from the right person.

When you love someone and they love you, you will both want to compromise in areas that you didn’t think you would want to compromise on (1 Corinthians 13:7).

With that said, “spiritual compatibility” is different (2 Corinthians 6:14, Philippians 2:2-5). A couple who is not equally yoked spiritually is doomed to fail.

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