Proverbs 16:9
Do you have really strong feelings for someone that you are not in a relationship with? Perhaps you really like this person but for whatever reason you haven’t been given the chance to date them. Or maybe you did date them, it didn’t work out, and yet you still have really strong emotions about this person?
Here are 3 possible reasons God is not taking away your very strong feelings for someone.
And I also wanted to quickly let you know that I just opened enrollment for AGW University. I created these courses specifically for Christians singles (of any age!) who want to glorify God in marriage one day.
So if you are someone who wants advanced biblical teaching from me designed to help you meet, date, and marry the right person God may have for you, then I encourage you to check out AGW University to see if this might be a good fit for you.
Lastly, for everyone who enrolls before the May 20th deadline, I’m offering a scholarship and 90 days of email coaching with me. For more information about this unique opportunity, click here to visit AGW University.
1. God May Not Be Removing Your Strong Feelings for This Person Because Your Strong Feelings Aren’t Really About This Person
There are times when people have an inner ache without fully knowing why they have it. They just know they feel pain in their heart, they just know things aren’t supposed to be this way, and they just know there is something missing in their life (Acts 17:26-27).
So in some cases, people end up looking for a reason to explain the pain they’ve always felt. This is why some people can feel so hurt about someone they didn’t even know that well. They are using this person to explain their unexplainable pain.
In the moment, it feels good to have an explanation for why you are hurting so much. However, when this pain isn’t actually connected to this person, your pain won’t go away even when you actually get over this person.
This is why some people feel like they can’t get over this person. They still have pain, so they assume they are still connected to this person, even though in truth, they aren’t; it just feels like they are because they still hurt inside.
But again, oftentimes they are simply using this person to explain an inner pain that is not actually related to this person. So what is this pain actually related to?
2. God May Not Be Removing Your Strong Feelings for This Person Because You Have Not Yet Received the Love of God, Which Is What You Are Truly Seeking After
Human relationships are the next best thing to a relationship with God. We are made in his image in a greater way than anything else he has created. So when your heart is craving the love of God for which it was made, it will often try to find relief somehow, and this is when we usually go to another person to fill us. This always ends badly.
Human love is a blessing. It’s good to want to find your person and get married. But human love is not the reason for the deepest ache in our hearts. That deep ache which we were born with is pointing us back to God (Psalm 51:5-6).
Without God filling your heart with his love, you will always feel pain. Thus, sometimes you will always be sad and hurting about human relationships because you are wrongly attaching your inner ache to these human relationships instead of to your broken relationship with God.
When you are right with God through Christ (Romans 5:1), when you are drink deeply of his love (Romans 5:5), you will still have pain in human relationships, but it won’t be so all consuming and controlling (Romans 5:3-4). Perhaps you will stop having such strong feelings for this person once you drink more deeply of God’s love for you.
Points 1 and 2 were just one side of the possible explanations for why you have such strong feelings for someone. Now we need to transition to other possibilities because even after your heart is full of God’s love, it’s still possible to have really strong feelings for someone.
So if you’re right with God and you’re not idolize this relationship, why isn’t God taking away your strong feelings for this person?
3. God May Not Be Removing Your Strong Feelings for This Person Because He May Want You to Use Them as Motivation to Do Really Hard Things
Maybe you are extremely fearful of pursuing a woman because you’ve been rejected in the past. Or maybe you are very scared to be more inviting towards a guy you like because you tried this before and you felt like a fool afterwards. Or maybe you grew up in a dysfunctional home and you are terrified of getting into a bad marriage like your parents had.
However, perhaps there is this other side of you that really desires to find true love. Maybe you are afraid and have many barriers blocking you from a relationship, but there is also this undeniable craving in you to meet the love of your life.
You will never do the hard work and overcome your deepest fears without an intense reason to do so (Matthew 19:23-30). This is often why God is not removing your very strong desires for someone. He wants these desires to motivate you to do the things you have been too afraid to do in the past.
All that to say, it can be difficult to properly unpack your relationship feelings and desires. This is one of the reasons I created AGW University. There’s only so much we can cover in an article that can be read under 10 minutes.
So if you’re someone who wants more advanced biblical teachings about healing from past relationship wounds and moving forward to find the right person God may have for you, feel free to click here to learn more about my relationship courses.
And if you want the scholarship and the 90 days of email coaching with me so you and I can discuss your relationship variables together, make sure you enroll before the May 20th deadline.
Click here to visit AGW University!
