Romans 12:18-19
Here are 3 signs God is telling you to block someone.
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1. God Is Telling You to Block Someone If They’ve Betrayed Your Trust in an Irreversible Way
Matthew 6:15, “But if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”
Matthew 18:21-22, “‘Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?’ Jesus said to him, ‘I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.’”
Colossians 3:13, “Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.”
With these verses in mind, is it ever biblical to say that someone has broken your trust in an “irreversible” way? Yes. Many people misapply what the Bible says about forgiveness by confusing forgiveness with reconciliation.
No matter what someone does to you, if you are a Christian, you must forgive them 100% of the time. To forgive means you release your desire for revenge, you release any hate in your heart towards them, and you accept that Jesus’ punishment on the cross was enough to wipe clean the sins done to you.
However, forgiveness doesn’t mean you forfeit justice. Revenge and justice are different. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you regain your affection for someone. Loving your enemy and having fond feelings for them are different.
Additionally, people misapply verses about forgiveness because they forget that the Bible does give different rules for different types of relationships. When it comes to romantic relationships, for example, there needs to be a different kind of affection present to choose this type of relationship before marriage. If you’re not married and you don’t want to be with someone, you have zero obligation to be with them. And even when marriage has already occurred, Jesus allowed for divorce if adultery took place (Matthew 5:32).
God requires you to forgive, but he does not require you to trust everyone again after they betray you. There are some betrayals that ruin the relationship forever and make reconciliation impossible (Romans 12:18). If this has happened to you, it means you should forgive this person and block them.
2. If Blocking This Person Will Actually Create More Peace Between You Two, This Is a Sign God Is Telling You to Block This Person
It’s ideal if two people can live at peace with each other by being kind. But when two people continually fail over and over again to be kind to each other, sometimes the only way to create peace is to create separation.
People often confuse the words peace and unity. For example, God tells Christians to be separate from the world (2 Corinthians 6:14-18), so we can’t have unity with unbelievers who hate God (James 4:4). However, we can have peace with them, which means we live in a respectful way without trying to cause harm to each other.
Likewise, on an individual bases, there will be people in your life that you just cannot have unity with. However, you can create peace through creating separation. You can stop the war by going your separate ways. As Romans 12:18-19 states:
If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’”
If you can’t “live peaceably” around someone, you must not “live” around them anymore – meaning you need to create boundaries to create peace. If you can’t find unity and you’re constantly tempted to take revenge on this person, one of the most biblical things you can do is keep your distance to create peace.
Forgive them. But accept some people just can’t be at peace with each other under any circumstance besides going their separate ways.
3. If This Person Is Not Accepting Your “No,” It’s Time to Stop Talking and Just Block Them
I’ve had many women email me something like, “I know I’m in a sinful relationship with my ex-boyfriend, but every time I tell him I don’t want to be with him, he just keeps pursuing me. He just keeps calling me. He won’t accept my answer.” This same thing can happen to men too.
While it’s easier to move on when someone accepts your rejection of them, their refusal is not an excuse to keep going with someone you know God does not want you with. You can’t allow someone else’s actions to be God’s answer to you in instances like these. You may be praying that this person just leaves you alone so you can move on, but it’s your job to obey what God is saying to you.
If someone just won’t accept your “no,” you have to block them. If you already spoke the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15) and explained to them why you don’t want to be together, you’re not ghosting them by cutting them off. You are simply setting a stronger boundary because they are not respecting the boundaries you’ve tried to give them.
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