4 Signs You Need to Reject a Lie That Is Blocking You from True Love

1 Corinthians 13:1-3

Here are 4 lies you need to reject if you hope to find true love one day.

1. Believing the Lie, “I Have to Follow My Feelings” Will Block You from True Love

One of the most common ways we get blocked from true love is by chasing the counterfeits. And one of the reasons we chase counterfeit lovers is because we have believed the lie that we have to follow our feelings.

When you lead with your feelings, you are often making relationship decisions based on attachments rather than facts. If you get attached to a relationship that is not filled with true love, you will fight for this relationship because of an attachment rather than because there is true love there.

If you are wondering if this is happening to you, list all the qualities you hope to have in a relationship one day and then list all the qualities that are actually in this relationship you are attached to. If there is a mismatch between these two lists, it means you are blocking true love because you are following your feelings and rejecting facts.

Of course feelings will be involved in true love, but biblical true love has certain qualities to it (1 Corinthians 13:4-8). You will find true love when your feelings are supported by the facts of the love present.

2. Believing the Lie, “I Missed My Chance” Will Block You from True Love

One danger in thinking you know what will happen when you meet someone is that when it does not happen, you now believe you have missed God’s will for that relationship.

When you believe lies like, “This person is better than everyone in the world,” or, “This person is the one,” or, “If I mess this up, I will never find someone like this again,” you will be blocking yourself from finding love. 

You can’t change the past, but you can change what you believed in the past. You can’t bring this person back, but you can stop believing they were the one for you. If they were really the one, in God’s sovereignty he would have arranged for you two to be together.

Reject the lie that you have missed your chance at love. God’s grace is always sufficient to create new things in our lives (Ephesians 3:20-21).

3. Believing the Lie, “There Are No Options for Me” Will Block You from True Love

If there were truly no Christian singles in the world, no other Christians singles would be getting married. But they are. Every day, Christian singles are meeting each other, dating, and getting married.

One reason many Christian singles feel like they are the only one in the world is because they are surrounding themselves with worldliness. If you are living in the world, all you will see is worldliness. Sometimes we need to change our environments so we can see different types of people. In 2 Timothy 2:22, we are commanded to seek out pure relationships. God would never command you to do something that was impossible to do.

Of course Christian relationships are harder to get into because the world is full of more people who don’t love Jesus than do love Jesus. But if you believe the lie that there are no romantic options for you, you will live in that lie and feel like there are no romantic options for you.

But there. They may be hard to find. You may need to do some personal development so you can attract these types of people. But God has not run out of godly singles for his people.

4. Believing the Lie, “Love Isn’t Worth the Hassle” Will Block You from True Love

You may need a season away from dating and relationships to regain your footing with the Lord. And some relationships truly are not worth the hassle because the drama far outweighs the good fruit being produced.

But overall, love is worth the hardships. Yes, love is hard. Yes, loving someone involves pain. Yes, life is simpler without relationships. But without love, you have nothing. Even if you feel called to singleness, God still calls you to have meaningful, deep relationships filled with love. And if you are called to marriage, God has called you to fight through the pain to get to the pleasure love is meant to bring for the glory of God. As 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 explains:

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.”

Why would God allow you to fall in love with someone who did not love you back? I answer that important question in this article: 4 Reasons God Let You Fall in Love with Someone Who Does Not Love You Back.