Matthew 15:19
Here are 5 signs that often mean God is preparing you to meet your faithful spouse who will not betray you in marriage.
1. If God Has Let You Meet Unfaithful People to Help You Develop Better Discernment, This Is a Good Sign He Is Actually Preparing You to Meet Your Future Faithful Spouse
Perhaps one of the strongest motivating factors to seek out a faithful spouse is actually feeling the pain of betrayal. When you have never been betrayed, it’s much easier to get into an unhealthy relationship that has many bad signs pointing to a future betrayal.
But when you have been betrayed, it changes you. How it changes you will be determined by how you respond. But it will change you. Being betrayed will either make you bitter, cynical, fearful, and walled off towards relationships. Or it can help you develop a healthy level of discernment that God will use to lead you to a faithful spouse one day. Notice how God used betrayal in Paul’s life. 2 Timothy 4:9-18 states:
Do your best to come to me soon. For Demas, in love with this present world, has deserted me and gone to Thessalonica. Crescens has gone to Galatia, Titus to Dalmatia. Luke alone is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is very useful to me for ministry. . . Alexander the coppersmith did me great harm; the Lord will repay him according to his deeds. Beware of him yourself, for he strongly opposed our message. At my first defense no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me. May it not be charged against them! But the Lord stood by me and strengthened me, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and all the Gentiles might hear it. So I was rescued from the lion’s mouth. The Lord will rescue me from every evil deed and bring me safely into his heavenly kingdom. To him be the glory forever and ever. Amen.”
When Paul was betrayed, this made him value his faithful friends even more, like Timothy, Luke, and Mark. He longed to see Timothy, “For Demas” deserted him. The “For” here makes it clear his being deserted by Demas made him long to see his faithful friend Timothy. And most of all, these betrayals helped him value his relationship with God above all else.
When you allow God to use the pain of a past betrayal for good in your life, he will teach you how to detect unfaithful people and how to spot faithful people.
2. If God Is Putting a Desire in You for a Spouse Who Wants to Keep the Marriage Bed Holy, This Is a Good Sign He Is Preparing You to Meet Your Faithful Spouse
God made sex to be used as a powerful bonding experience meant to connect the heart of a husband and wife in marriage. But when used in improperly, this powerful tool can be used to separate the heart of a husband and wife if one of them is unfaithful.
In Matthew 5:32, Jesus forbids divorce except for one reason, “But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.” Hebrews 13:4 says, “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”
If you are willing to compromise and have premarital sex, you are increasing the chances of marrying someone who will betray you sexually in marriage one day. But when God has put in your heart a commitment to only marry someone who is willing to wait with you to have sex until marriage, this is a good sign the Lord is preparing you to marry a faithful spouse.
3. If God Is Giving You the Ability to See Faithful Qualities in Other Non-Relationship Forms in People, This Is a Good Sign He Is Preparing You to Spot Your Faithful Spouse One Day
Someone who is not faithful in other parts of their life has a higher probability of being unfaithful in relationships too. If someone cheats on their taxes, cheats their work of company time, or even cheats in silly ways like in meaningless games meant just for fun, this is a bad sign. You want to see faithfulness and integrity in all areas of someone’s life to better predict faithfulness in marriage one day. Colossians 3:22-25 (NIV) states:
Bondservants, obey your earthly masters in everything; and do it, not only when their eye is on you and to curry their favor, but with sincerity of heart and reverence for the Lord. Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. Anyone who does wrong will be repaid for their wrongs, and there is no favoritism.”
“Whatever you do,” you are called to do it faithfully to God. If God is giving you the ability to see someone who is faithful in all areas of their life, this is a good sign he is preparing you to see your faithful future spouse one day.
4. If God Is Making You Into the Type of Person That Will Not Betray Their Spouse One Day, This Is a Good Sign He Is Preparing You to Meet Your Future Faithful Spouse
Here’s a general relationship principle that usually happens in most cases: People are attracted to people like them.
This principle works in both positive and negative ways. People who like to indulge in certain sins will attract other people who also like to indulge in those sins. But people who are trying to honor the Lord usually attract other people who are also trying to please the Lord. Of course there are exceptions to his principle. But usually attraction does work like this.
In Matthew 7:16 Jesus said, “You will recognize them by their fruits.” While this verse should help you see the value of assessing people’s actions, it’s also important to note that God will be leading his other children to use this same standard as they assess you.
So if you want to attract a faithful spouse who will not betray you in marriage one day, you have to first develop those qualities of loyalty in yourself.
5. If God Is Helping You See the Difference Between a Relationship with Jesus and Mere Religious Duty, This Is a Good Sign God Is Preparing You to Meet Your Future Faithful Spouse
In Jesus’s Sermon on the Mount, one of his main points was that the heart is what matters more than mere duty with the body. In Matthew 5:27-28 Jesus taught, “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
Later on in Matthew 15:19, Jesus also said, “For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander. These are what defile a person. But to eat with unwashed hands does not defile anyone.”
When you begin to learn the difference between mere religion and a true relationship with Jesus that changes the heart, you will be better equipped to spot other people who also have a true relationship with Jesus.
If someone does not have a transformed heart through the gospel of Jesus, they are much more likely to betray you. But a person with the Holy Spirit in them has the ability to remain faithful (Galatians 5:22).