Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Here are 5 things that often happen when God is highlighting someone that he wants you to be with.
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1. When God Is Highlighting Someone He Wants You to Date, Your Paths Will Often Keep Crossing to Give You Opportunities to Connect
Certainly God has put people together who met each other online or started through a long-distance relationship. But more often than not, when God his leading you to date someone, he will allow your paths to keep crossing in life so that you have opportunities to get to know one another.
For example, it’s not a sign that God wants you with someone if you just keep seeing someone at church. But if you both are talking every week at church, if you both are now in the same small group, if you both are now serving together, or if you both keep gravitating towards one another at every group event – these are good signs you two are headed towards a dating relationship.
Song of Solomon 2:7 states, “I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.” God will often show you that the time is right to date after you have had a healthy amount of opportunities to get know one another first.
2. If You and This Person Are Encouraging One Another and Strengthening Each Other When You Are Together, This Is a Sign God Is Highlighting This Person in Your Life
Relationships are interesting because anytime you put two people together you always get a unique mixture. You and Person A will create very different results than you and Person B. When God is highlighting someone that he wants you to date, he will do this by showing you the good that you and this person produce when you two are together. As Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 states:
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”
This doesn’t always happen when just any two people are spending time together. But when God is highlighting someone he does want you to be with in a more significant way, you will know by the strength you both receive by being together.
3. When God Is Highlighting Someone in Your Life, This Person Will Help You Flee Youthful Passions So You Can Better Pursue the Lord Together
When God wants you to date someone and then marry that person one day, this will not be marked by a perfect relationship that has no sin. When you put two sinful people together, it is impossible for there to be no sin at all.
With that said, the mark of a true Christian will be evident by the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-24). Likewise, the mark of a godly relationship will be the fruits of the Spirit being produced together. Notice what 2 Timothy 2:22 states, “So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.”
So when God truly is pointing someone out to you because he wants you two together, this relationship will help you flee worldly passions while you are pursuing godly passions together.
4. If God Is Showing You Someone’s Faithful Character, This Could Be a Sign He Is Highlighting This Person Because He Wants You Two Together
If you want something specific for your future, the wise thing to do is to plan for that in your present with the Lord. One of the main biblical differences between marriage and any other relationship is that this bond is supposed to be for life. Certainly divorces happen for too many reasons to count and no one should look down on anyone else because of divorce. But we must also recognize that God desires marriage to be for life, which is why in Mark 10:9 Jesus said, “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
So if you want a marriage that will last a lifetime, you should plan for that future in your present by only dating someone who shows faithfulness now. Despite our best efforts and even when someone showed us they were faithful, divorces still happen in some marriages. Divorce is sometimes out of our control because of the actions of the other person, but we should do everything in our power to prevent this from happening to us by looking to date only faithful people.
5. If God Is Showing You that You and This Person Could Fulfill the Biblical Roles of a Husband and Wife Together, This Is a Good Sign God Is Highlighting This Person to You
When you read through Bible passages like Ephesians 5:22-33, it becomes very clear that both the wife and husband have the exact same importance in the marriage but that both are to fulfill different roles as they seek to reflect the love relationship between Christ and his church.
If someone wants you to fulfill the role of a wife even though you are a man or if someone wants you to fulfill the role of a husband even though you are a woman, this is not a good sign. But if you see that this person values the differences between a husband and wife and desires to celebrate the compatibility God designed in marriage, this is a great sign.
So God will highlight someone for you by showing you that this person will celebrate your femininity as a woman or celebrate your masculinity as a man rather than trying to make you something that you are not.
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