If a man is sending you mixed signals, what should you do? What is God saying about this?
In this article, I will give you some possible answers God could be sending a woman when she is confused about a man’s mixed signals. I will offer a wide variety of possibilities based upon varying factors, so you’ll have to pray about each possibility, since sometimes mixed signals are normal and sometimes they are red flags.
With that said, here are 4 things God might be saying to you if a man is sending you mixed signals.
1. When a Man Sends You Mixed Signals, God Could Say, “Be Patient”
Let’s start with a situation that involves a man and a woman who don’t know each other that well yet. Perhaps you’ve talked to a guy a few times at church. One Sunday, he seems really excited to see you, but then next week, he walks right by you like you don’t exist. What gives?
In a situation where the man and woman don’t have a long history together yet, it’s very normal for a woman to feel like the man is sending her mixed signals. The truth is, he probably is sending you mixed signals. However, this isn’t always a sign that he’s a player with low character. While some players will send mixed signals to keep you guessing and to play head games, it’s also true that a normal guy who has good character might send mixed signals for reasons that are not sinister. For example:
- A man may be sending mixed signals because he is trying to not to scare you away. If he talked to you last week and seemed really excited, he might have reflected on his actions and begun to worry he was being too forward with you. Therefore, he might back off a bit because he’s afraid of moving too fast with you and scaring you away.
- A man may send mixed signals because he has mixed feelings about you. While every woman wants a man who is confident in his feelings for her, it’s unrealistic to expect every guy to know exactly how he feels about every woman, particularly when he hasn’t had chances to really get to know her yet. He may stop sending mixed signals once he knows you better and gets more clarity about his own feelings.
- A man may send mixed signals because he is trying to gauge what signals you are sending him. Are you just talking to him because you are nice and don’t want to be rude by ignoring a man who came up to talk to you? Or are you actually interested in him and want him to keep coming up to talk to you? A man struggles to answer these questions. Thus, he might be attentive one minute and distant the next because he’s trying to understand what you want from him.
The point is, when a man doesn’t know a woman very well yet, it’s not a huge red flag if he seems to send mixed signals. It really only becomes a bigger issue if his mixed signals persist over a long period of time, even when he has had chances to get to know you more.
Trust the Lord! In time, he will give you clarity. Psalm 32:8, “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you.”
2. When a Man Sends You Mixed Signals, God Could Say, “Be Steady in Me”
While I do believe God really wants to help you find clarity about the possibility of you and this man, I believe God’s first priority when a man is sending you mixed signals is helping you guard your heart (Proverbs 4:23). Even if a man isn’t a bad guy who’s trying to hurt you, it can be very emotionally exhausting and stressful when you’re unsure of a how a guy feels about you.
To avoid going down to crazy town in your mind, the key is to remain steady in Christ no matter what does or doesn’t happen with any guy. Whether a guy is head over heels in love with you or is sending you crazy mixed signals that make your head spin, the Lord wants to be your rock at all times. Psalm 32:7, “You are a hiding place for me; you preserve me from trouble; you surround me with shouts of deliverance.”
Not only will this help you emotionally, but remaining steady in Christ will also help this man know where you are at. Sometimes a man sends you mixed signals because he feels you are sending him mixed signals. If you’re emotionally unstable about him, that is going to affect your behavior towards him. And if you are sending him mixed signals, that will only make him more confused, which will probably cause him to send you even more mixed signals.
Thus, the best thing you can do is be steady yourself. When a man and woman are both fighting their own anxieties and doing their best to remain steady in Christ, the Lord will help them get on the same page eventually.
3. When a Man Sends You Mixed Signals, God Could Say, “Ignore Him”
As Christians, we can struggle with the idea of ignoring someone. But sometimes, it’s absolutely the right thing to do. For example, if you let someone be the thermostat for your emotional well-being, you will be an incredibly unstable person, particularly when this person is sending you mixed signals. While you should start by being patient and trying to send clear signals yourself, sometimes a man will continue to send you mixed signals no matter what you do.
In instances like this, to protect your emotional well-being, you might need to start ignoring him. Whether he sends you great vibes or distant vibes, sometimes the only way to protect your peace is to ignore all the vibes he’s sending.
Additionally, ignoring someone isn’t just the best thing for you sometimes. Sometimes, it can be the best way to help this man, too. Sometimes a man struggles with insecurity, and he tries to make himself feel better by making someone else feel insecure. He may be emotionally manipulating you to boost his own ego. In love, you can discipline him through ignoring him. This will force him to confront the root issue and, hopefully, turn to Christ for validation as a man.
Perhaps he then moves on and is healthier towards other women in the future. Or, perhaps your change in behavior towards him will be the wakeup call he needs to realize he might miss his chance with you if he doesn’t get his act together soon. He could then start pursuing you in a more consistent and respectable way.
As Psalm 32:6 explains, there is great comfort when we take advantage of the time and correct our errors, “Therefore let everyone who is godly offer prayer to you at a time when you may be found; surely in the rush of great waters, they shall not reach him.”
4. When a Man Sends You Mixed Signals, God Could Say, “His Confusion Is Your Answer”
Eventually, there comes a time when you have to accept the situation for what it is. If a man keeps sending you mixed signals, no matter what you do or don’t do, you must interpret his confusion as a clear answer from the Lord. If he’s consistently inconsistent, that is a clear answer.
When God is leading, confusion will not persist. The Spirit’s presence always creates order, not chaos. While it can take time for the chaos to get in order, it’s also true that if there is no process of ordering occurring, we have to accept that the Spirit is not in this.
Psalm 32:9, “Be not like a horse or a mule, without understanding, which must be curbed with bit and bridle, or it will not stay near you.”
Whether this man’s mixed signals are just there because the relationship is new and headed towards clarity, or whether the man’s mixed signals are a red flag and mean he’s not right for you, either way, the Lord will guide you if you seek him above all else.
