While some people certainly do have the gift of singleness, which means God will lead them to be single for their whole life, there are many other people who God wants to be single for just right now. When the time is right, he will then release these people to be married.
Therefore, here are 3 signs God is saying, “I want you single right now.”
1. God Probably Wants You Single Right Now If You Just Got Out of a Relationship or You Were Recently Emotionally Hurt By Someone
It’s certainly not a biblical requirement for you to always remain intentionally single for a period of time after a dating relationship ends. If the relationship was healthy and you two parted ways in a mature fashion, a break from relationships may not be necessary.
In many cases, however, God will lead you to take a break from relationships once you do break up with someone or you go through an emotionally intense experience. How will you know if you should pursue a relationship now or remain single for a period of time?
You should look at the signs that should always be present when you are about to enter into a new relationship: Are you right with God? Can you enter into a relationship without idolizing it? Are you prepared to seek marriage if this person ends up being the right one for you? If you answer “no” to questions like these because you are still dealing with past relationship wounds or trauma, you should intentionally remain single right now.
Psalm 147:3, “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” God is faithful to heal, but we need to go to him and allow him the time to heal us.
2. God Wants You Single Right Now If You Need to Go Through a Season of Sanctifying Your Sexuality
It’s a mistake to think that you need to be fully sanctified before you are ready for marriage. Why? Because according to Scripture, Christians will always be on the path of sanctification in this lifetime (Hebrews 10:14). We are justified fully as Christians, but sanctification is an ongoing process where we continue to mature in the Lord.
So don’t think you need to be perfect to receive “your person” from the Lord. However, when it comes to sexual sanctification, we need to be very careful we have reached a certain level of maturity before entering into a relationship.
When you are in a romantic relationship with someone, the sexual temptation will be heightened, and we are to flee sexual temptation (1 Corinthians 6:18). You can either flee sexual temptation by avoiding relationships or by dating towards marriage. But just dating and engaging in sexual sin is not fleeing sexual temptation.
Additionally, if you are weak in that area, you will likely become a temptation to this other person (Luke 17:1-2). For your sake and theirs, if you are not able to exercise enough self-control to avoid sexual sin in dating, you should remain single for now.
But this should be seen as a seasonal calling because if you have a strong sexual desire, this is also a sign God wants you to pursue marriage one day. You don’t want to think you are forever disqualified because of past sexual sins. As Paul said in 1 Corinthians 7:2, 9:
But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband . . . But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.”
3. If You Feel Called to Accomplish Something for God that Requires Singleness, God Wants You Single Until You Accomplish the Task
One of the signs that you have the call to a lifetime of singleness is when you are able to serve God better as a single person. The primary question that helps you know what God is telling you to do in regards to singleness or marriage is “Can I serve God better in singleness or marriage?”
A small amount of people are wired to serve God better in singleness. For most people, they are better able to serve God when they are married. But there is also a third category that many people fall into. Some people are better equipped to serve God in singleness right now but one day they will be better equipped to serve God in marriage.
If you know God is telling you to do something that requires you to be single, do that. But don’t be surprised if God then tells you to pursue marriage once you complete that task. God certainly puts his people through seasons, and seasons always change.
Either way, put the Lord first and he will lead you where he wants you to go (Matthew 6:33, Proverbs 3:5-6).
