Here are 4 marks of a man sent by Satan, or being used by Satan, to block you from your future husband.
1. When an Unhealthy Man Is Manipulating Your Kindness to Stay in Your Life, Satan May Be Using Him to Keep You from Your Future Husband
Kind, compassionate women are gifted by God in incredible ways that the world desperately needs. However, our greatest gifts are often connected to our greatest weaknesses. While kind, compassionate women are gifted in loving hurting people, they are often the ones who struggle the most with creating boundaries for unhealthy people.
- Maybe he is an unbeliever who constantly makes you feel like he is almost ready to become a Christian. He tells you he is thinking about faith. He comes to church every now and then. He says he wants to change. And because you care about him, you begin to believe that it is your responsibility to save him (1 Corinthians 2:14-16, 1 Timothy 1:15). Rather than releasing him to God, you allow him to control your life.
- Or maybe he has serious addictions, destructive habits, and major character problems. But you feel sorry for him because he was abused, neglected, or deeply hurt in his past. His pain may be real. His story may be tragic. But his pain does not excuse the way he is currently choosing to live. And when you allow him to remain in your life, his destructive habits will block you from moving forward in life (1 Corinthians 15:33).
- Or perhaps he repeatedly apologizes, promises to change, and makes you feel guilty whenever you try to leave. But an apology without repentance is often just another form of manipulation. Jesus said, “You will recognize them by their fruits” (Matthew 7:16). You cannot build your life around a man’s potential while ignoring his present fruit.
You can love someone and still leave them. You can forgive someone and still refuse to date them. You can have compassion for someone’s wounds without allowing those wounds to become weapons used against you.
Never let Satan manipulate your gift of kindness and compassion to keep unhealthy men in your life that will block you from your future godly husband.
2. When You’re Attached to a Man Because of Past Sexual Sin, Satan May Use That Attachment to Keep You from Your Future Husband
Sometimes a woman feels spiritually and emotionally trapped in a relationship because of what happened sexually.
Maybe you think, “I already gave myself to him. The only way to make this situation feel worthwhile is to marry him.”
Or perhaps you think, “If I leave him now, then all of that sexual sin was for nothing.”
But you do not redeem sexual sin by marrying the wrong person. The cross of Christ is our redemption! Remember, Scripture states, “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come” (2 Corinthians 5:17).
You may have sinned with someone, but that does not mean you are now obligated to spend the rest of your life with him. Your past sin does not determine God’s future for you.
Also, because sex was designed to bond a man and woman together in marriage, sometimes sexual intimacy creates a powerful emotional attachment that is making it difficult to let a man go. You may know the relationship is unhealthy, but you still feel intensely connected to him because of the bonding chemicals released in sex. You may think, “I know he is not good for me, but I just can’t let him go.”
The only way to break these bonds, however, is to stop fueling them. The biological effects of sex will eventually be erased if you stop the sins. Like breaking free from a drug addiction, it will be painful at first. But eventually God will reset your brain chemistry.
This is a process. To break free, just start, and over time, God will set you free (2 Corinthians 3:17-18).
3. When a Man Has All the Qualities You Want but Is Not Pursuing You, Satan May Use Your Infatuation with Him to Keep You from Your Future Husband
This one can be especially difficult because the man may actually be a good man.
He may be kind and spiritually mature. He might be attractive and emotionally intelligent. And he might be compatible with you in practical and spiritual ways. There’s just one problem. He’s not actually pursuing you.
Now, to be clear, I would not say that Satan literally sent a godly man into your life to block your future husband. But Satan can certainly tempt you to become so emotionally attached to a man who is not choosing you that you become unavailable to the man who will.
- You might spend years analyzing every text message from a man who never actually asks you on a date.
- You might remain emotionally committed to a close male friend who repeatedly tells you he only sees you as a friend.
- Or you might constantly compare every man who shows interest in you to one particular man who seems perfect—but who has never actually pursued a relationship with you.
At some point, you have to distinguish between a man’s potential and his actual intention (1 John 4:1). Never allow a fantasy relationship with someone who is unavailable to make you reject a real relationship with someone who is available. In the end, you will see that the real far exceeded what you could have imagined (Ephesians 3:20).
4. If a Man Hurt You So Badly That You Have Given Up on Love, Satan May Be Using Your Wounds to Keep You from Your Future Husband
Sometimes the man blocking your future is no longer in your life. But what he did to you still is controlling you.
- Maybe he cheated on you, and now you assume every man will cheat.
- Maybe he abandoned you, and now you refuse to trust anyone.
- Maybe he manipulated you so badly that you now believe every man’s interest must have a hidden motive.
If you allow one person’s sin to determine how you treat every future person, then the person who hurt you is still controlling your life. When you forgive someone, you are also saying, “I will no longer let you control me.” Forgiveness gives you your power back.
Hebrews 12:15 (NLT), “Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many.”
While an evil man sent by Satan may have wounded you, God can give you a man who you can heal with. You two will hurt each other because we’re all sinful. But when Christ is in the relationship, he uses what was meant for evil for our good (Romans 8:28, Genesis 50:20).
