By studying applying Judges 16:1-22, which is the story of how Delilah ruined Samson, we can identify 5 types of phrases women use when they are sent by Satan and secretly want to control a man.
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1. Controlling Women Sent By Satan Ask Really Personal Questions So They Can Use This Knowledge Against You
In Judges 16:5-6, we are told that Delilah was sent by Samson’s enemies to find out his weakness. Verse 6 then states, “So Delilah said to Samson, ‘Please tell me where your great strength lies, and how you might be bound, that one could subdue you.’”
When we apply this to dating modern women sent by Satan, we can say that they will be looking for your weaknesses. And to do this, they will ask questions that are actually pretty personal. Some men would never share this type of information with anyone, but when a beautiful woman asks during an intimate moment, a man’s defenses are often lowered. She might ask things like
- So what’s your biggest fear?
- What happened between you and your last girlfriend?
- Have you ever cheated on someone?
- Do you struggle with porn?
- How much money do you make?
These aren’t sinful questions to ask. A woman who’s wondering if she should marry a man should ask these types of questions at some point. But if a woman starts asking stuff like this too soon, if she hasn’t shown an ability to keep information private, you’re a fool if you bear your soul to her. There are things we’ve done that we aren’t proud of. God’s grace is sufficient. But don’t give the devil ammo to ruin your reputation.
A controlling woman will use personal information against you when it suits her agenda.
2. Controlling Women Sent By Satan Use Dumb Tests to Make You Prove Yourself
There are so many stupid viral videos going around nowadays of how women test their men to see how they respond. This isn’t new. Godless women are always playing games.
Notice what Delilah did in Judges 16:7-14. Samson lied to her about his weakness. But before totally betraying him and actually releasing the Philistines on him, she tested him first to see if he really told her the secret to his strength. When he was asleep, she would wake him, crying that the Philistines were there to attack him. He would then awake with all his strength. They went through this charade three times. Each time she tested him, but he failed the test, which led to her nagging him until he finally told her the truth the fourth time.
Modern women try to get men to jump through hoops to prove their love. For example:
- They often use the jealousy test and say something like, “My coworker said I looked really good today” or “My ex texted me.” They then see if the man responds with enough jealousy to prove himself.
- Some women use a delayed response to test men. They wait a really long time to respond to a text, maybe even days, to see how the man reacts. If he’s not upset, it means he doesn’t care.
- There’s the fake breakup test. She says, “Maybe we should just end this,” or “I think you’d be happier without me.” She doesn’t mean it. She just wants to see how you react.
The kicker is when a woman secretly films you with her phone and then laughs about how all this was a big joke later. This is childish behavior. If a woman is playing these games, she’s not just testing your interest level, but she’s also testing how much nonsense you will put up with. She’s looking for a man she can control.
3. A Woman Sent By Satan to Control You Will Use the Same Phrases Over and Over Again to Wear You Down
Controlling women are relentless. Notice that in each of the three times Delilah tested Samson, she basically said the same thing. She asked about his strength, she then woke him up from sleep by screaming that the Philistines were there, and then she would complain when she realized he was still too strong for his enemies.
This is the definition of nagging. While some women use deceptive words and clever manipulation tactics, when all else fails, controlling women just go with an all-out frontal assault. They will badger, complain, and nag a man until he finally gives in and does what they want.
Proverbs 19:13-14, “. . . a wife’s quarreling is a continual dripping of rain. House and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.” Godless women annoy and nag. Godly women are sensible and wise. They work with the man so they both can be happy together.
4. A Controlling Woman Sent By Satan Questions Your Love
While a man should prove his love for a woman, he should do so over time and with genuine care expressed through actions. A controlling woman, however, will rush the process. Judges 16:15-17 states:
And she said to him, ‘How can you say, “I love you,” when your heart is not with me? You have mocked me these three times, and you have not told me where your great strength lies.’ And when she pressed him hard with her words day after day, and urged him, his soul was vexed to death. And he told her all his heart . . .”
Modern women sent by Satan to control you may say things like:
- How can you say you love me if you’re not willing to spend more money on me?
- How can you say you love me if you don’t want me to move in with you?
- How can you say you love me if you’re going to choose your work over me?
If a woman is saying things that start with the phrase “if you really loved me,” she’s probably a control freak.
5. A Controlling Woman Sent By Satan Uses Comforting Phrases to Lower Your Guard
The most dangerous phrases are often the most comforting. In Judges 16:18-20, after Samson finally told Delilah the truth, he fell asleep in her lap. He felt comforted. He trusted her. But while he was resting, she was preparing his destruction.
That’s how controlling women often work. Before they betray you, they soothe you. They use calming phrases to disarm your discernment. They may say things like:
- “You can trust me. I’d never hurt you.”
- “Just relax. You’re overthinking this.”
- “You don’t have to be so guarded with me.”
- “I’m not like the other women who hurt you.”
Proverbs 29:5 (NIV) says, “Those who flatter their neighbors are spreading nets for their feet.” Be careful of words that make you feel safe before trust has actually been earned.
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