Genesis 2:24
Here are 5 amazing things that God often uses to reveal the one he wants you to marry.
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1. When God Leads You to The One, the Problems You Face Will Bond You Together Rather Than Break You Apart
In our minds we often imagine God’s path for our lives to be the easy and smooth road. But the more we walk with God the quicker we realize this is a myth. The same is true when it comes to relationships. We imagine that God will reveal “the one” to us by giving us a relationship with this person that is perfect, stress free, always clear, and never confusing.
But that is not what happens at all. In fact, something much more amazing will happen when God leads you to the one he wants you to marry. Your relationship will not be absent of issues but those issues will actually cause you two to become even closer. In the midst of Job’s sufferings, he uttered this little line of hope. Job 23:10 states, “. . . when he has tried me, I shall come out as gold.”
When God wants to unite a man and woman, he often welds them together like two metals. To weld two metals into one solid piece, you have to heat those metals up in the fire and stress them first before they will become malleable and able to connect into one piece. Likewise, God will often put you and the person he wants you to marry through the furnace of affliction together, but when you come out on the other side you will come out as one rather than two separate pieces.
2. When God Leads You to The One, Your Love for One Another Will Only Grow Deeper Over Time
Passion early on in a relationship is like the heating process that helps make the initial bond between two metals. It’s a good thing that is needed early on in the relationship. But just as two welded pieces of metals need to then cool to form the strongest of bonds once they’ve been joined together, so too does this initial phase of passion in relationships need to mature into something deeper if a strong bond is to be formed in marriage one day.
Certainly as the years go by with this person there will still be moments of romance and passion, but when God leads you to the one, something even more amazing than passion will start to happen. You will transition out of that honeymoon phase of your relationship and enter into a season where the love is much deeper and intimate. Because you two will know each other in a much deeper way than you did at first, the love between you two will be much deeper as well.
Notice how Song of Solomon 4:10 points out that deep love is even better than excitement and worldly pleasures, “How beautiful is your love, my sister, my bride! How much better is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your oils than any spice!”
Many people go through seasons of passion and excitement in dating, but when God is truly leading you into a godly relationship that will result in marriage one day, the passion will actually morph into something even deeper and much better. It’s truly amazing to get past the fun season of passion to then realize there’s something even better on the other side.
3. When God Leads You to The One, Neither of You Will Join the Other Person’s Life. Rather, You Will Start Forming a New Life Together
Couples run into issues when they start thinking they need to mesh their two lives together. On a practical level that is certainly true. Once they get married one will need to move into the other’s house, they will start sharing finances, and or one of them may need to move to join the other person in that city. So in the practical sense they will need to combine their two separate lives into one.
But on a deeper level, when God leads you to “the one”, one of you will not be joining the other person’s life and leaving your life behind. No, instead you will be forming a new life together. When a man and woman become a husband and wife, they become a new family separate from their previous family units. They are still a part of those larger families in a bigger sense, but they now have a greater allegiance to each other and have formed a new family unit together.
So when God is leading you to the one he wants you to marry, it will not be about one of you joining the other but about the both of you becoming one, for as Genesis 2:24 famously states, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” This truly is an amazing process.
4. When God Leads You to The One, You Will Lose Your Fear of Missing Out On Something Better
One fear that many people have in dating is that if they commit to one person this means that every other person is now off limits. What if there is someone out there that they click with even better? What if there is an even better love connection they can have if they only kept looking? These types of thoughts and fears are natural concerns to have because marriage should be a commitment for life.
But when God truly leads you to the one, these types of fears will go away. It’s an amazing act of God for two people to look at millions of other options but then say to each other, “No, I only want you for the rest of my life.”
In Mark 10:19 Jesus said, “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” Who joined them together? God himself.
5. When God Leads You to The One, You Will Be Willing to Let Go of Your Expectations So You Can Enjoy What God Has Planned for You with This Person
I have no idea what that person will be like who God has planned for you to marry. All I know is that they will not be exactly like the person you are imaging them to be. As the common Christian joke goes, “If you want to make God laugh, just tell him your plans.”
In all seriousness, thankfully God will never meet your expectations because he always surpasses them when we truly embrace his will for our lives and relationships. When you meet the one God has for you, you will be able to let go of your expectations because you will realize this person God has made is far better for you than the person you created in your mind years ago. As Ephesians 3:20-21 states:
Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”
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