Here are 5 things that will happen to you when God is speaking to you about someone.
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1. God Is Talking to You About Someone When You See in Their Actions Indicators Mentioned in Scripture
Over the years, I’ve come to use the word “signs” most often when referring to “evidence for what God wants you to do.” I use this word because it’s the word most people understand and use. But another word that could replace the word “signs” in all the videos and articles I’ve made is “indications.”
An “indication” is “a piece of information that indicates something.” In other words, it’s evidence. When you have a sore throat, that’s an indication you are sick. When your mouth is dry, that’s an indication you need some water. When your mouth is watering when you look at some food, that’s an indication you want to eat it.
In Scripture, God has told us about many indications that help us assess people. For example, when you see the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23), that’s an indication (or sign) someone is following Jesus. When you see the fruit of the flesh (Galatians 5:19-21), that’s an indication (or sign) someone is not following Jesus.
Through studying someone’s actions and then comparing those actions to what Scripture says, you will know what God is saying to you about someone.
2. God Is Talking to You About Someone When You Feel Confirmation or Conviction in Your Heart When Praying About Your Relationship with This Person
We should always start with the word of God because if we sense something in our hearts that is not biblically true, we know we are mishearing God.
However, we must also remember that the Trinity is not Father, Son, and Holy Scriptures. Rather, it’s Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Through the Scriptures we know that God has promised to guide Christians through the Spirit’s leading:
- Galatians 5:25, “If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit.”
- Romans 8:13-14, “For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God.”
- Acts 20:22-23, “And now, compelled by the Spirit, I am going to Jerusalem, not knowing what will happen to me there. I only know that in every city the Holy Spirit warns me that prison and hardships are facing me.”
When you quiet your heart before the Lord and you pray about your relationship with someone, the Spirit will guide you. He will give you a conviction about something not good, confirmation about what is good, or the wisdom to know when you just need more information before you can make an informed decision about this person.
3. God Is Talking to You About This Person When Things Happen Outside of Your Control that Directly Answer the Questions You Had About This Person
If you asked God if you should date this person but then this person starts dating someone else, God has given you your answer. If you asked God if this person likes you, and then this person shares their feelings with you out of the blue, God has given you your answer. If you’re asking God if you should get to know someone more at work but then they quit and move across the country to marry someone else, God has clearly spoken. Romans 8:26-28 states:
Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”
4. God Is Telling You Something About This Person When Other Trustworthy People Give You Helpful Information About This Person
Of course Christians should always be careful not to engage in gossip since that is a sin. But the Bible also encourages Christians to help each other in all aspects of life, including when it comes to relationships.
You have a much better chance of getting into a good relationship and avoiding a bad relationship when you include other people in your decision-making processes:
- Proverbs 15:22, “Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.”
- Proverbs 9:9, “Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning.”
- 1 Timothy 5:20, “As for those who persist in sin, rebuke them in the presence of all, so that the rest may stand in fear.”
Whether it be through a trusted mentor encouraging you that this person is good for you, whether it be through a good friend warning you to take it slower, or whether it be through church leaders publicly disciplining someone, God will often speak to you about someone through other people.
5. God Is Talking to You About Someone When Reality Contradicts Your Feelings
Feelings are important. God will tell you a lot through your feelings. When you feel happy, sad, courageous, or fearful, this can help you learn something about the current condition of your heart.
But when it comes to relationship hopes with someone, your feelings don’t matter if they contradict reality. You can feel this person is the one for you, and perhaps they are. Perhaps in time your feelings will be proved true. But if reality never matches your feelings, God is speaking through reality and not your feelings.
Likewise, you can have fears in your heart that this person you love will betray you; but if the reality of this person shows you that they are trustworthy, eventually you have to stop trusting your feelings rooted in past wounds and embrace reality – otherwise you will miss out on a good relationship.
God is sovereign (Ephesians 1:11), which means what happens is a part of God’s will. By accepting reality, you can hear what God is telling you about someone.
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