In Ephesians 6:10-12 Paul, warns us that unseen demonic forces will uses “schemes” to attack God’s people. By definition, a scheme is an intricate assault that seeks to bring harm without you even noticing it. This is why Satan loves to use relationships for his evil agenda.
For these reasons, if you are a Christian woman who is seeking to please the Lord, it is highly likely Satan will try to use a man to harm you. Therefore, to help you guard against an evil man with demonic influence sent to attack you, here are 4 biblical marks you should look out for so you can properly take your stand in the Lord against your real enemy.
1. A Man with Demonic Influence Sent to Attack You Will Be Marked By a Spirit of Control
When I use the phrase “a spirit of control,” I don’t necessarily mean that this man will be possessed by a spirit of control so then he will act in controlling ways. Rather, I’m using the word “spirit” here to mean “attitude” or “feeling” or “disposition.”
Of course all men and women are unique individuals, but there does seems to be trends among the sexes when it comes to the common expressions of our sinful nature. For men, one common expression of our sin nature is aggressive control (Genesis 3:16, Colossians 3:19). When a man is walking in the flesh and rejecting the Holy Spirit’s leading in his life, he will often have an unhealthy desire to dominate the woman in his life and control her in ways that are completely inappropriate for a Christian man.
When God calls a man to lead (Ephesians 5:24-25), he does so using the biblical definition of leadership. In Mark 10:42-45, Jesus taught us that worldly leaders use their power to dominate and serve themselves while Christian leadership is all about loving those you lead through sacrifice.
Therefore, if a man is controlling and self-serving while acting like he’s just trying to lead like the Bible says, this is a strong sign he’s under demonic influence and was sent to attack you.
2. A Man with Demonic Influence Will Tempt You to Lead Him
While some men will be influenced to be overly controlling, other men will be used by the devil to tempt you into fulfilling a role you were never designed to fulfill.
Notice that in Genesis 3 when Satan tricked Eve into rejecting God’s ways, Adam was present. However, he was so passive that this encouraged Eve to lead in a sinful way. Genesis 3:6 states, “. . . and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate.”
Satan will tempt you to get off track by trying to pair you with a passive man. You will say to yourself, “Well, he’s at least open to Christianity. He just needs some help.” You then begin to lead him, which leads you out of your feminine role, causing a domino effect of more and more pain as you get further and further away from God’s design for relationships.
Don’t let your compassion tempt you into corruption. A man is called to lead in marriage. If he needs you to lead him before marriage, he’s not the one for you.
3. A Man with Demonic Influence Will Want Covenant Privileges Without Covenant Commitments
God has given us his written Scriptures so we know how to glorify him. God wants a man and woman to commit to each other in the covenant bond of marriage before offering each other certain privileges because this is what brings glory to God. To glorify God, we must reflect him. He offers immense privileges to those who enter into a covenant with him.
Therefore, Satan will want a man and woman to do the opposite of this so they will not glorify God. A man with demonic influence will tempt a woman to enjoy pleasures that are meant to be unlocked by covenant commitments even though no commitments are made. Not only does this dishonor the Lord because it does not accurately bear his image and character, but intimacy without commitment always leads to wounds.
Commitment provides safety for intimacy. When you go deep with someone, you form bonds with them. If you two are not committed in marriage, you lack the necessary protection needed to safely enjoy those deepest levels of intimacy. Notice how Jesus tried to help the Samaritan woman:
“The woman answered him, ‘I have no husband.’ Jesus said to her, ‘You are right in saying, “I have no husband”; for you have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true.’” (John 4:17-18)
Jesus was pointing out her pain. She had no husband but she was in a relationship with a man who crossed the boundaries that only a husband should be allowed to cross. To help this woman, Jesus pointed this out so she could repent and turn to follow God’s original design for relationships.
Thus, Satan will use a man to tempt a woman to act like she’s a wife to a man who’s not really her husband.
4. A Man with Demonic Influence Will Try to Damage Your Identity in Christ
Satan’s main goal is to always hurt your walk with God (2 Corinthians 4:4). Therefore, when a man is being influenced by demonic forces and is sent to attack you, he will try to aim arrows at your personhood in Jesus. Usually these arrows come in the form of verbal darts:
- “No one is going to put up with your crap but me. You should be grateful I’ve been so patient with you.”
- “If you don’t sleep with me I’m going to leave you. I love you but a man needs sex. Your standards are unrealistic.”
- “Can you just relax with the whole Christian thing. You’re taking it too far.”
If a man ever comes between you and Jesus, Satan is involved. Get away from that man. He’s not the one God has for you.
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