3 Really Hard Things God Will Use to Lead You to The One

Psalm 32:8-9

We often think that the love of God would lead him to spare us of pain. But in truth, when you study the Scriptures, it becomes clear that God’s love is the reason he often does not spare us of pain. He loves us so much that he will let hard things happen to us if they will result in even more joy for us and more glory to him.

This is also true when it comes to relationships. Therefore, here are 3 really hard things God will often use to lead you to the person he wants you to marry one day.

And I wanted to briefly mention that today is the last day you can get a free course from AGW University with the purchase of my new book, Christ-Centered Dating.

More information about this new book and the free bonus course can be found at the end of this article.

1. God Will Break You and Humble You Before Leading You to The One

If you want God to lead you to the person he has for you to marry one day, that means you must also follow his leading. When God leads, he doesn’t just force and manipulate us to do what he wants. Rather, he gives us the choice to either follow his leading or deny his leading (Psalm 32:1-4). And unfortunately for us, our natural proclivity is to pridefully reject his leading and opt for our own leading (Psalm 51:5).

In love, therefore, God will let our own bad choices break us and he will use the difficulties of life to humble us (Hebrews 12:5-7). Only when we are broken and humbled are we able to follow God. And by broken and humbled, I don’t mean damaged and beaten down. I mean submissive and willing. Psalm 32:8-9 states:

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you. Be not like a horse or a mule, without understanding, which must be curbed with bit and bridle, or it will not stay near you.”

God wants us to be obedient without him having to jerk us around and control us like a mindless beast. In love, however, God will let us get broken the hard way if that’s what we need (Psalm 119:71). He loves us too much to let us pridefully pull away from him and into bad relationships.

Therefore, when he leads you to the person he wants you to marry, he will do so by letting you be humbled first so you can actually follow him like you need to do in order to receive his blessings (Psalm 32:10-11). 

2. God Will Bring This Person Into Your Life Before You Are Fully Ready

Most of us would prefer to get 100% healed and matured before meeting the one. But it’s not going to happen like that. God will actually use this relationship to deepen your healing and sanctification.

Marriage will not be the reward of being perfect. God will use marriage, and many other things, to continue you down the perfecting path of Christ (1 John 4:7-21).

This is hard. Really hard. Instead of living a fairytale with whimsical music in the background, your relationship with the one will be more like a redemptive drama that has both highs and lows throughout the story. Just like the rest of your Christian journey (2 Corinthians 6:10), your path with the one God has for you will be painful but it will be worth it, sorrowful but full of joy.

As God uses this relationship to draw out the wounds that need to be healed in you both and as your relationship is used to mature you both in Christ, this will deepen the love you both have for each other and for God.

3. God Will Let You Be Confused When You Meet The One

God is not the author of confusion (1 Corinthians 14:33), so I’m not saying God will cause you to be confused. But God is still sovereign over confusion, meaning he can use it for his glory when he permits it to happen.

The fact that we are confused sometimes in life is evidence that God allows confusion because God can prevent anything he wants to prevent. Thus, it’s biblical to conclude that God permits confusion because he has a purpose for it in our lives (Genesis 50:20, Romans 8:28).

Without deep, burning questions, we would not find deep, satisfying answers. Confusion causes us to seek help from our Teacher. This is also true when it comes to meeting the one God has for you. We all wish God would just look into his crystal ball and tell us the future. But in love, God uses the doubts and fears and unknowns to deepen our faith in him.

When you meet the one, it will be hard because it will be confusing: “Does this person really like me like I like them? Should we be friends for longer or date now? Will this relationship end painfully? Is there someone better out there for me? Is God speaking to me or is this just my own voice? How can I really know if this is God’s will for me?”

These questions are not easy to answer, but God will use these confusing questions to lead you to the person he has for you.

There’s a lot more to say about this, so if these are topics you would like to learn more about, I would highly encourage you to read my new book called Christ-Centered Dating: Pursuing a Relationship that Glorifies God.

To my knowledge, there’s never been a book written about this very specific topic that I cover in Christ-Centered Dating. There’s been books about Christian dating. There’s been books about how to glorify God. But in this book, I talk about how to glorify God through Christian dating.

You see, in most churches, Christians are taught to glorify God to get a spouse. I don’t believe this is what God wants. Rather, God wants us to use everything, including our pursuit of marriage, as a means of bringing more glory to himself. So rather than trying to glorify God so he will then bless you with a spouse, I believe the biblical path is to pursue marriage so you can glorify God, which is the ultimate blessing in life. Our greatest life will be achieved not when we put ourselves or romance at the center, but when we put God at the center of everything we do. And this applies to relationships too.

And if you purchase this book before tonight, February 17th at 11:59pm, I’m also giving you a full AGW University course completely for free. It called, 10 Steps to Meet The One: How to Step Out in Faith Rather than “Just Waiting” in Fear. This course is 10 video sessions and it’s one of the most important courses I’ve ever made.

Christ-Centered Dating is available in paperback, eBook, and audiobook formats. You’ll be able to buy this book whenever you want as it will remain available from here forward. But, if you purchase this book before 11:59pm tonight, I’m giving you this free course too.

So if you’re interested in getting a book and a full course just for the price of a book, here are the steps to follow!

Step 1: Before 2/17/2023 (11:59pm), purchase Christ-Centered Dating on Amazon in any format (paperback, eBook, audiobook) by clicking here: https://amzn.to/3Hc50Mv

(Note, as long as your book receipt shows that you purchased it on or before 2/17/2023, you can do the following steps in the days ahead.)

Step 2: Email your proof of purchase to here: bonuscourse@applygodsword.com

(You can simply forward your Amazon receipt/confirmation email to the above email. Or you can also take a screenshot of the receipt/confirmation and send it to the above email.)

Step 3: Within 24 hours, once your proof of purchase has been verified, you will receive an email with the 100% off scholarship code for the free bonus course (along with the link to enroll in the course).

Step 4: Enroll in the course, 10 Steps to Meet The One. At check out, use your scholarship code. The course can also be found here: https://agwuniversity.teachable.com/p/10-steps-to-meet-the-one

Step 5: Enjoy the book and free bonus course! And if you find the book helpful, it would be a big blessing to me if you could leave a review on Amazon. This helps other people feel more comfortable purchasing the book to then learn the important truths inside of it.

God bless!

Mark