5 Things God Does Right Before You Meet Your Person

Everyone’s story is unique, especially when it comes to meeting the person God has called you to marry. And yet, for many Christians, there are common themes through which God prepares his people to thrive in a godly marriage.

So in this article, I’ll be focusing on 5 things that God often does right before you actually meet the person he will lead you to marry one day.

1. Before God Introduces You to Your Future Spouse, He Often Leads You to Stop Looking So Hard for Your Future Spouse

Notice I didn’t say that God will lead you to stop looking for your future spouse. I said he will often lead you to stop looking so hard. While some people will meet their future spouse without intentionally looking, God will lead other Christians to meet their future spouse through more intentional means, such as online dating or getting set up on a date by a mutual friend.

While everyone’s story is unique, the normal pattern for God giving us anything is that he includes our effort in the process. When he gives us food, he does so through our work (2 Thessalonians 3:10). When he gives us growth, he does so through our reading of the word (2 Timothy 3:16-17). When he saves people, he does so through other Christians’ witness (Matthew 5:13-16).

So the real point here is not that you should stop looking. But when you are frantic, desperate, and discontent, that will often block you from being ready for this gift God wants to give you. Thus, before God reveals the one to you, he often puts you on a journey to examine why you feel so much pressure to get married right now.

And along that journey, he helps you find pure motives for marriage that put you in a much better position to receive this blessing (James 4:3).

2. Before God Introduces You to Your Future Spouse, He Often Prepares You to Not Be So Passive Like You Have Been in the Past

One way God often prepares you to do this is by giving you healthy relationship experiences with people you will not end up marrying. While God will never lead you into sin, not every romantic relationship experience that ends without marriage was because of sin. Sometimes a godly man and woman feel it out and just decide it’s not God’s will.

Many times, singles wonder why God would even allow this to happen in the first place if he knew they would never get married. One reason is that God often teaches his children in these relationships that don’t end in marriage to prepare them and make them ready for the relationship that will end in marriage. Judges 3:1-2 states:

Now these are the nations that the Lord left, to test Israel by them, that is, all in Israel who had not experienced all the wars in Canaan. It was only in order that the generations of the people of Israel might know war, to teach war to those who had not known it before.”

To prepare you for the future, God often allows you to go through trials in the present.

3. Before God Introduces You to Your Future Spouse, He Often Empowers You to Repent of a Secret Sin that Would Sabotage Your Marriage

Pornography, substance abuse, screen addiction, shopping addiction, video game addiction, obsessing over your social media numbers, jealousy, anger, and so many other things can be easily hidden from the world while we struggle in private.

But when you get married, these private sins immediately affect someone else. Thus, to prepare you for a healthy marriage, before God introduces you to the right person, he often first helps you repent of any hidden sins (1 John 1:5-10).

4. Before God Introduces You to Your Future Spouse, He Often Helps You Think Outside of Your Own Experiences

All we know is what we’ve experienced. And yet, all of our experiences are different. While we can’t change that reality, there is a way of maturing that enables you to see beyond your own view to someone else’s.

When you are always stuck seeing everything through your own lens, it makes it very difficult to thrive in a committed relationship. While it’s great when you meet someone you’re really compatible with, the key to peace isn’t ultimately compatibility. Rather, the key to peace is pairing up with someone who also possesses the ability to compromise in conflict (Philippians 2:1-5).

This is a skill you have to learn. It doesn’t just appear when you need it in marriage. Thus, before God gives you a spouse, he will often teach you how to consider the needs and experiences of others through your interactions with friendships, coworkers, and family members.

5. Before God Introduces You to Your Future Spouse, He Often Changes Your Routine

Ruth met Boaz when she moved to Bethlehem (Ruth 2). Moses met Zipporah when he left Egypt (Exodus 2). Rebekah met Isaac when she left her land and followed Abraham’s servant (Genesis 24).

The point is, before God introduces you to your future spouse, he often introduces you to an entirely new community. Maybe you’re sensing it’s time to move, time to go on a mission trip, time to get involved in a new ministry at church. Sometimes a change in routine is the move that happens before you see a change in your relationship status.

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