6 Behaviors that Mean a Man Secretly Likes You

Proverbs 15:13

The Bible doesn’t give us direct verses about knowing if a man secretly likes a woman. However, through applying biblical principles to this topic, we can discover some helpful tips.

First off, the Bible is clear that we should not judge someone’s heart and motives (1 Samuel 16:7, Matthew 7:1). Rather, the Scriptures teach us to assess someone’s behavior (Matthew 7:17). Additionally, the Bible (particularly in the Proverbs) gives us many signs that mean someone is joyful.

Therefore, by applying these biblical signs of joy to a man’s treatment towards a woman, we can see at least 6 behaviors that often mean he secretly likes her.

1. A Change in His Normal Countenance When He Sees You

The word “countenance” refers to one’s facial expressions. We all have different default facial expressions. Some of us are always smiling. Some of us tend to have a more serious look.

However, the variables that come into our lives then cause our facial expressions to change, giving others a window into how we feel on the inside. As Proverbs 15:13, “A glad heart makes a cheerful face . . .”

Therefore, pay attention to how his face changes when he sees you. If he is always smiling around everyone, it doesn’t mean that much if he’s smiling when you come into the room. However, if he’s normally smiley but then looks a little nervous or like he’s preparing himself to speak with you, that could be a little cue he’s excited to see you. Likewise, if he’s normally not a smiley kind of guy but you make his face look happy, again, he might like you.

2. A Happiness in Mannerisms When You Respond Positively to His Subtle Pursuit

Most men build the pursuit more and more as they see more and more evidence that the woman wants to be pursued. This means he usually starts small with her. Before he asks her on a date, he will see if she will at least talk to him first. If she talks to him, he will see if she is open to communicate more with him. If she is open to this, then he will eventually ask her on a date.

Along the way, he will be examining the woman to see what kind of messages she is sending. Proverbs 15:30 (NIV) states, “Light in a messenger’s eyes brings joy to the heart, and good news gives health to the bones.” When a man sees a woman respond positively to him, there will be an expression of joy reverberating through his bones – his body.

3. An Expression of Relief When He Says Something that Makes You Happy

It can be a lot of pressure for a man when he starts liking a woman. He knows he’s the pursuer, which means he knows he is the one who needs to face the possibility of rejection in a more direct way. When he’s preparing a plan about what to say to her, he waits with eager anticipation to see how she will respond.

As Proverbs 15:23 (NIV) says, “A person finds joy in giving an apt reply—and how good is a timely word!” When he feels like he said the right thing to you because you have responded well to it, he will take a deep sigh of relief. You will sense the pressure wash away from him once you respond positively to what he has planned to say to you.

4. A Consistency Towards You Even When You Are Having a Bad Day

No one is perfect. We all have bad days. Perhaps a man at work likes you but you are a bit short with him one day because a deadline is fast approaching for an important project you are responsible for. Or maybe you are feeling particularly sensitive one Sunday morning and you misinterpret something he says to you at church, then walking away in a frustration. 

While you shouldn’t expect a man to put up with unnecessary rudeness, if he really likes you, he won’t be so quick to give up on you. He will understand that you may have been having a bad day. If he secretly likes you, he will also have an extra amount of grace for you compared to a man who doesn’t have any feelings for you.

As Proverbs 17:17 says of a true friend, “A friend loves at all times . . .”

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5. If Your Treatment of Him Has an Effect on His Joy, for Good or Bad

If a man doesn’t have secret feelings for you, your behavior towards him isn’t going to affect him very much. You won’t be able to make him very happy or sad. However, when a man does secretly like you, your treatment of him will have a more obvious effect.

Proverbs 17:22, “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” In other words, when our hearts are joyful, people can see it in how healthy we look. However, when we are sad about something, it can actually affect how healthy we look too.

6. If a Man Is Always Searching for More with You

While a man may have secret feelings for you, he won’t want them to be secret forever. Eventually he will want to express himself to you. This usually happens in a way that builds little by little over time.

As Proverbs 15:15 states, “All the days of the afflicted are evil, but the cheerful of heart has a continual feast.” The term “a continual feast” alludes to this idea of wanting more and more of the good one is enjoying.

When a man likes a woman and she makes him happy, he will want his connection with her to grow even more. If they have a good conversation, he will try to have another one. If they keep connecting, he will want to connect even more deeply. If they start going on dates, he will eventually want to start dating. If they keep dating, he will eventually want to get engaged.

In short, if you are in the early stages of romance with a man, he secretly likes you if he keeps wanting to go deeper and deeper with you every time you have a positive interaction together.

Related Article: 5 Better Ways to Draw a Man to You Instead of Chasing Him