Is God telling you to move on from a relationship you wish would work out? How can you be certain God is really leading you to let go of a relationship? What signs will be present when God is actually telling you to move on?
It’s always difficult when you are unsure of what do when you really like someone but you still don’t know what God wants. Perhaps there is conflict between you two and you are wondering if you just need to work through it or if this is a sign from God you need to move on. Or perhaps you want to be with this person but this person is not giving you a straight answer about wanting to be with you.
In any case, here are 3 signs that mean God is telling you to move. The first of these signs is absolute and the other two are “probably” signs that God is telling you to move on from someone you want to be with.
If the Relationship Is Unbiblical or Consistently Causing Sin in Your Life, God Wants You to Move On
One sign that is very clear that God is telling you to move on is if the relationship is unbiblical or it is consistently causing you to sin.
Sometimes we over complicate knowing the will of God for our lives. When it comes to matters clearly explained in the Bible, we do not need to wonder what God is saying. The Holy Spirit will never lead you to do something that is forbidden in the word of God.
So if you are wondering if you should be with an unbeliever, you don’t need to wonder. God has clearly said not to be unequally yoked (2 Corinthians 6:14). If you are wondering if you should stay in a relationship where you are consistently falling to sexual sin, you don’t have wonder. God has clearly said to flee from sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 6:18). If being with someone is pulling you away from God, you don’t have to wonder. God is telling you to move on because 2 Timothy 2: 22 states, “So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.”
In short, it is a sign from God that he does want you to move on from a relationship if you are violating the word of God by being in this relationship.
If the Word of God, the Spirit’s Impressions on Your Heart, and the Circumstances in Your Life All Point to the Necessity of Moving On
There are at least three ways to hear the voice of God: Though his word, through his Spirit, and through the circumstances of your life. I’ve talked about how to apply these three ways of hearing God in multiple other places so I won’t do that again here. (For more on this see, “How Will God Tell You Who to Marry?”)
While each of these three ways are all important, when you can confirm what God is saying through all three means then you can be very confident in God’s will for your life. So if you are asking God if he wants you to move on, you should study the word, listen to the Spirit’s leading in your heart, and look at the circumstances of real life.
For example, if you read the word and realize this person is not producing the fruits of the Spirit that are outlined in Galatians 5:22-23, then you spend time in prayer and feel like the Holy Spirit is telling you to let this relationship go, and then you look at the history of dysfunction in this relationship that has happened in real life – these three pieces of evidence are telling you what God is probably saying.
If all three of these means of hearing God are pointing in the same direction of moving on from this relationship, you can be confident you have a sign from God.
If Not Moving On Will Keep You Standing Still, It’s Probably a Sign God Is Telling You to Move On
So let’s say there is no biblical issue in this relationship. Let’s say that you cannot tell what God is saying through his word, the Spirit, or the circumstances in your life. What should you do then?
I believe God is probably calling you to move on from this person you wish you could be with if not moving on would keep you right where you are. In other words, if you don’t move on, would this stop you from progressing forward with God in your life? If yes, then God is probably telling you to move on.
When a relationship is going well, you can move forward together. When a relationship is obviously not working out, you can break up and move forward as you go your separate ways. The danger of not knowing what God is saying is that you can get frozen for long periods of time.
So let’s say you really like a close friend of yours. You’ve expressed interest but nothing seems to be happening. This has been going on for years. Does God want you to move on in your heart or hold onto hope that the two of you will one day be together? I believe God is probably calling you to move because if you don’t you will keep being stuck when there is no evidence to believe that this situation will ever change.
You should always have a progressive view of relationships. Dating should always be used to move forward in relationships one way or the other. If it’s going well, keep moving towards marriage. If it’s not going well, breakup so you don’t move towards marriage. Just dating as an end goal is not wise. Likewise, even if you are not dating, you should still have this mentality in singleness to be forward thinking.
Don’t get stuck hoping for something that will never happen. Keep moving forward so you don’t miss out on what God does have for you.