How will a man behave when he wants to be in a long-term relationship with you? In this article, we will discuss 4 things a man will never do when he hopes to have something meaningful with you.
Also, I’ll be talking from a biblical perspective. So these points won’t apply to worldly men who may want a long-term relationship.
Lastly, if you’re a Christian single person who wants biblical advice on how to best meet, date, and marry the person God may have for you, I created AGW University for you. I designed these relationship courses for people who feel stuck, who don’t know what else to try, and who want to be in a godly relationship but simply don’t know how to get there.
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1. When a Man Wants a Long-Term Relationship with You, He Doesn’t Rush the Beginning Phases
Some men may think they want a long-term relationship with you, but deep down, they really just want the thrill of pursuing a woman who could be a long-term partner.
In other words, there are many guys who enjoy the chase more than the destination. Once they feel they could have a long-term relationship with you, they lose interest and start chasing a different woman.
One way to spot those types of guys is to take note of their unwarranted intensity. They will be really passionate about you, but they won’t really know you yet. They will seem extremely secure in their desire for you, but deep down, you will sense a superficial value system that is motivating their pursuit. His intensity towards you will feel good, but it will also make no sense. Why is he so sure about you if he barely knows you?
Usually, the answer to that question is infatuation. Infatuation causes a man to see an image of you that is based on emotion and lust. And as we all know, emotions and lust are like vapors, often evaporating just as quickly as they came.
When a godly man wants a long-term relationship with a woman, he makes sure to lay a good foundation. He will eventually be very intentional and serious about his pursuit of you, but he will first need to know the real you. He is going to take his time in the beginning because once he decides to pursue you into a long-term relationship, he’s going all in.
Proverbs 21:5, “The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty.”
2. When a Man Wants a Long-Term Relationship with You, He Doesn’t Compromise His Chances with You By Dabbling with Other Women
When a man really wants something, he knows he will have to say no to those other things that may get in the way. If he really wants to get in shape, he will stop eating donuts. If he really wants to save his money, he will stop buying stupid things. If he really wants that promotion, he will say no to all the social invites so he can put in the time at work.
Likewise, when a man actually wants to be with a woman long-term, he will be ready to say no to those things that might get in the way – namely, other women. If a man is leaving his options open, he’s not that serious.
The Bible teaches that a wise man doesn’t “scatter his springs” among many women (Proverbs 5:16). When a man truly desires a relationship, he doesn’t risk it by entertaining other options. Rather, he focuses his attention and energy on the one woman he really wants.
3. When a Man Wants a Long-Term Relationship with You, He Won’t Lead with His Desire for Sex
As Christians, we all know premarital sex is wrong. And no true Christian would want to disobey God and have premarital sex. And yet, many true Christians who want to honor the Lord do end up falling into some forms of sexual sins in dating before marriage. This comes back to the sin nature doing what we hate (Romans 7:19-20)
So I’m not saying that everyone who has sinned sexually is not a true Christian. And I’m not saying that if a man and woman struggle with sexual sins in dating, that this automatically means God is saying they are not meant to be. Of course, they must repent and seek to honor the Lord. But it’s too simplistic to say that a man and woman who struggle in this area don’t want to have a long-term, godly relationship.
However, that is much different from the guy who barely knows a woman and is doing things to seduce her. Or, for example, the guy who laughs when a woman talks about wanting to abstain from sex before marriage – that is not a godly man who wants a long-term relationship.
When a guy is leading with his sex drive, he sees you as an object, not a long-term partner.
4. When a Godly Man Wants a Long-Term Relationship with You, He Will Be Preparing Himself Spiritually to Handle This Blessing
A mature Christian man knows that you are God’s daughter. And he knows how valuable you are to God. Thus, he will sense an immense responsibility at even the thought of being in a long-term relationship with you.
Noting motivates a man to mature more than the thought of being responsible for someone he loves.
If a guy is drifting in his walk with God and isn’t preparing to thrive in his future role as a husband, that’s also a sign he doesn’t really care about being in a healthy long-term relationship with you. Godly men know that only when walking with the Lord are we able to lead a woman well (John 15:5).
And don’t forget, if you want to keep learning with me about relationships, AGW University is where I offer my most advanced biblical training. For more information about the current one-on-one email coaching, bonuses, and scholarship, click here before the 4/20/26 deadline!
