4 Signs a Man’s Friends Are Keeping Him Single

Here are 4 signs a man’s friends are keeping him single.

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1. If You’re Friends Are the Type of Men You Would Want Your Future Wife to Avoid, They Are Probably Keeping You Single

If you’re bitter and you think there are no Christian women out there for you, this article is not for you. If you are happy being single right now and not interested in meeting a woman, this article is not for you either. I’m talking to Christian single men who want to get married to a godly woman.

If that’s you, I know you are not going to settle for a woman who is playing stupid games with worldly men. You’re not looking for a woman who’s sleeping around, who has a foul mouth, and who likes to play drinking games on Saturday night rather than going to church on Sunday morning.

If you want this type of woman, you cannot be spending your time with the guys this type of woman is actively avoiding. Now, you may say, “But I’m not doing those things. These guys are my friends, but I don’t act like them.”

I would challenge that they are probably affecting your behavior more than you think (1 Corinthians 15:33). But for sake of argument, let’s say that’s true, that you really are living a godly life even though your friends are living a worldly life. Regardless, they are still going to keep godly women away from you.

Why? Because people will rightly assume we are like the people we spend our time with. Do you expect to meet a godly woman in a group of women sleeping around, playing mind games with men, and having no respect for themselves? No, you will assume a woman in a group like that is just like all those other women. The same will be assumed about you if your friends are worldly.

While we usually think of 2 Corinthians 6:14 in the context of romance, it certainly applies to friendship as well, “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” You can be a witness to your lost friends, but that is different than living life with them (James 4:4).

You need to let go of the worldly connections in your life if you want to start a godly family with a woman one day.

2. If You’re Friends Are Giving You Stupid Relationship Advice, You Need to Let Them Go If You Want to Be with a Godly Woman One Day

I’m not referring to the well-meant advice that you just disagree with. I’m not saying your friends need to be relationship experts. But we all know those worldly guys who view women as objects to manipulated.

You may think you can just resist your friend’s bad advice, but subconsciously it will wear on you. Besides, if a guy is telling you unbiblical ways to sin with women or how to manipulate them into liking you, this shows he has bad character. And 1 Corinthians 15:33 states, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.’”

Somehow, someway, if your friends have bad character, they are bringing you down.

3. If You’re Friends Are Tempting You Into Your Former Way of Living, They Are Also Keeping You Away from a Godly Woman

I’m not saying that a beautiful godly woman is God’s reward for you if you obey his word. Rather, I’m saying that it’s just logical to assume that a godly woman is going to want a godly man. If you are not a godly man because you keep falling back into worldly living, she’s not going to want to be with you.

And besides, sin is hurting your relationship with God most of all. So whatever needs to change for you to live for Christ, do that. As Jesus said in Matthew 5:30, “And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.”

4. If You’re Friends Are Partly the Reason You’re Being Lazy Rather than Driven in Life, They Are Also Keeping You Away from a Godly Woman

There’s a season for everything. I think it’s healthy to have seasons of life where you spend loads of times with your buddies just goofing off. Hopefully you can also help each other do meaningful things too, but just being young and having fun together is important. Male bonding is really crucial on our journey to manhood. We help initiate and shape each other in positive ways that can’t be done by spending time with women.

However, there comes a time where this season needs to end (1 Corinthians 13:11). For a boy to become a man, he needs to take responsibility for himself and gain the skills that will equip him to be able to take responsibility for others too. You still need other men in your life, but you don’t need immature guys who just want to goof off and be silly all the time.

A woman wants to follow a man. But before she chooses to submit to him, she’s going to want to first make sure he’s worthy of this respect.

If you’re wasting your life just hanging out rather than pursuing your godly goals, this will also keep godly women away from you. They want to marry a man who’s respected (Proverbs 31:23)

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