Besides Jesus, there is no human who is totally good in every way (Romans 3:10-12). Therefore, when you hear me use the phrase “a good man,” you have to keep that in context. I’m not saying there is a perfect man out there who will never make mistakes with you. However, there certainly are men who are repenting of sin and seeking to please the Lord compared to worldly men who love their sin.
Additionally, when I use the word “never” here, I do think it’s unrealistic to think a good man would never have any struggles with the things I’m going to be talking about. But I do strongly believe a good man will not “walk” in the things I’m going to be talking about. So try to think more about this man’s ongoing behavior and character rather than a moment of weakness or immaturity that he then repents of. I’m saying a good man will never consistently and blatantly do these things.
With that said, here are 5 things a good man will never do when he has feelings for you.
And on a quick sidenote, if you want more information about my relationship training courses, feel free to click here before the May 20th deadline.
1. When a Good Man Has Feelings for You, He Won’t Play the God-Card and Overcomplicate Things at the Beginning
Should a godly man be praying about who his wife will be? Yes. Should a godly man come up to you and proclaim that God told him that you are his future wife? No.
Even if this man really does feel like God spoke to him about you, he will keep that to himself until you two reach a more mature place in your relationship. Otherwise, a statement about how God told him about you two being together is manipulative and immature. It will either lead you to date someone you don’t know that well because you are unwisely following this man’s walk with God rather than your own, or it will instantly give you the creeps about a man who was otherwise likeable and interesting to you.
You both should be praying and following biblical wisdom. But we must always remember that God does warns us about following other people’s false visions (Ezekiel 13:6-7).
2. When a Good Man Has Feelings for You, He Won’t Have a Player’s Mentality
A player’s mentality is when a man seeks to portray himself in any way he can that would influence you to like him. If he needs to lavish you with compliments, make you insecure with negative words, love-bomb you, or disappear to make you desperate – whatever it takes, he will do it just so you will like him.
However, when a godly man has feelings for a woman, his goal is not to win her at any cost. His goal will be to honor the Lord and express the truth (Ephesians 4:15, Colossians 3:17). He will want to show this woman an accurate view of himself rather than wearing a mask so he can manipulate her into seeing what he wants her to see. He wants the right woman God has for him, and he’s willing to accept the Lord’s no when needed.
3. When a Good Man Has Feelings for You, He Won’t Try to Awaken Love Until It So Desires
As I mentioned in the beginning of this article, no man will be perfect. So it is possible that a good man may make some mistakes with timing. Maybe you feel like he is going a little fast and maybe you are right. But that is different than a man who is pressuring you and racing into romance at dangerous speeds (Song of Solomon 8:4).
So this point really relates to the overall thrust of the man’s movements with you. If you always feel like he’s pushing for more rather than being patient, that is a red flag. 1 Corinthians 13:4 states, “Love is patient.”
4. When a Good Man Has Feelings for You, He Will Value Your Character More than Your Physical Appearance
It’s really important to figure out why a man is so interested in you. It’s certainly not wrong for a man to think you are attractive. You want your future husband to be attracted to you. However, if his main motive in pursuing you is based in your physical appearance rather than your Christian character, that is an issue.
A worldly man’s first question is, “Is she attractive?” He then assesses her character. A godly man, however, first starts with a woman’s character. If she’s not godly, it doesn’t matter how attractive she is, he won’t pursue her.
A good man knows what Proverbs 31:30 states, “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”
5. When a Good Man Has Feelings for You, He Won’t Expect You to Pursue Him
An immature guy is going to need you to do all the relationship heavy lifting. He will be so scared to get rejected, you will have to basically tell him that you will date him before he will even try to pursue you.
When you meet a godly man who is mature in the Lord, he will pursue you (Ephesians 5:22-33). As a woman, you also need to invite him and respond positively to his pursuit, but you will not need to pursue him.
How can you be inviting while also letting him lead? That is one of the topics I cover at AGW University. For example, in my course called The Mind of a Man, I specifically lay out what a man needs to hear from a woman so he feels released to pursue her.
For more information about the current scholarship, email coaching, and all the other bonuses, make sure you visit AGW University before May 20th. Click here to learn more!
