The only true way to know if you’ve met the right person at the wrong time is to wait and see. If you never marry this person, this was not the person God has for you.
However, in many cases, God will allow two Christians to meet each other at the wrong time and then let them get married in the future. So why does God do this sometimes?
Here are 4 possible reasons for why God may allow you to meet the right person at the wrong time.
1. God Will Let You Meet the Right Person at the Wrong Time to Help You Both Build a Strong Foundation for Your Future Relationship
Many of you have heard the famous instructions in Song of Solomon 8:4, “that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.” But oftentimes the context of this verse is overlooked. Notice how the woman said this line in the context of struggling with loving this man through a difficult time. Song of Solomon 8:1-3 states:
Oh that you were like a brother to me who nursed at my mother’s breasts! If I found you outside, I would kiss you, and none would despise me. I would lead you and bring you into the house of my mother—she who used to teach me. I would give you spiced wine to drink, the juice of my pomegranate. His left hand is under my head, and his right hand embraces me.”
Notice how verses 1-2 use the word “would.” This means she is longing for something that she can’t currently have. Only when she gets to verse 3 is her longing for him realized. That’s when she warns us all not to awaken love until it pleases.
One reason God will let you meet the right person at the wrong time is to develop you for the future disappointments and the future trials. You will need endurance and patience in your future relationship, and God will often develop that in you before the need even arises.
2. God Will Let You Meet the Right Person at the Wrong Time to Help Motivate You in Your Singleness
Jacob and Rachel are certainly not a couple to mimic in every way. The inclusion of Leah, her servant, and Rachel’s servant is obviously not what God intended for marriage as it should always be between one man and one woman.
Nonetheless, we can see how motivated Jacob was to get the woman he desired. Genesis 29:20 states, “So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they seemed to him but a few days because of the love he had for her.”
It is possible God will give you a glimpse of the relationship he has planned for you as a way of motivating you to stay faithful during your singleness. Of course you must ultimately be motivated by your love for God, but at times God will let you see the future fruit of your faithfulness as a way of encouraging you to remain faithful in the present.
3. God Will Let You Meet the Right Person at the Wrong Time to Sanctify Your Motives
As I mentioned at the beginning of this article, the only true way to know if someone actually is the right person for you is by waiting to see if you two actually thrive in a relationship one day and get married.
This unknown, however, is sometimes used by God to strengthen your future relationship with this person. When you truly love someone you are not in a relationship with, you will want the best for them even if that means they aren’t going to be with you (1 Corinthians 13:5). When you can truly want the best for this person and have a pure motive for them, this is actually setting the foundation for pure love in the future.
When you want good for that person even if that good is not with you, this will help you move on if this person is not the one for you or this will help you have a pure love for this person when the time is finally right and God does put you two together one day.
4. God Will Let You Meet The Right Person at the Wrong Time to Show You It’s Up to Him and Not the Timing
Sometimes it’s the wrong time and God still want you two to get into a relationship before the timing is perfect. Why?
Because life is rarely perfect. By starting your relationship in imperfection, God is teaching you that your success together will not be built on perfect earthly conditions but rather on his grace and sovereign power to accomplish his will.
As Psalm 31:3, 15 explains, “For you are my rock and my fortress; and for your name’s sake you lead me and guide me . . . My times are in your hand . . .”
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